The Regular Show X Reader

The White Elephant Gift Exchange

All of the workers are outside. "Alright, everybody. It's the holiday season, so we've got a lot of things on the agenda. We've got to hang the lights on the tree, prepare the track for the annual sled-a-thon, and last, but not least, tonight is our yearly white elephant gift exchange." Benson said. Everyone, except Muscle Man, groans. "Whoo! Hear that, sugar plums? White Elephant. You all know Muscle Man brings it with the gifts. I'm gonna start bringing in the holiday cheer right now!"

He takes off his shirt, swings his shirt over his head, and leaves. "Whooooooo!!!" He said. "Here we go again." (Y/n) said. Later everyone is in Benson's office, and they start complaining. "Benson, you've gotta call off the white elephant." Rigby said. "Yeah, you know Muscle Man always pranks us by getting terrible gifts." Mordecai said. "Every year, his gifts ruin Christmas." Pops said. "Yeah, I love the guy, but he doesn't know when to quit." Fives agreed, and (Y/n) was rather surprised by that. 'Even Fives has had enough?'

"You remember the glove incident?" Skips asked. Benson covers his mouth to stop himself from throwing up, and then breaths. "Don't remind me. Every time, you think you're gonna get something you want, then bam! Muscle Man swoops in, steals your good gift, and you're stuck with his prank one. But this year's gonna be different, this year, we're gonna give him the horrible gifts." Benson said. (Y/n) looks at him in surprise. "Wait, really?" She asked. "Okay." Fives said. 'Damn, even Fives is on board.' (Y/n) thought. "Nice." Rigby said. "But there's no way of knowing if he'll pick the right gift." Mordecai said. "Yeah, good point." (Y/n) said.

"It's impossible to rig it." Skips said. "It's not impossible if the odds are stacked in your favor." Benson said. "What do you mean?" Rigby asked. "I mean, I've got a plan." Benson said. The scenario begins to everyone in the living room during the white elephant gift exchange. "The order of the white elephant gift exchange is decided by picking random numbers out of a hat." Benson said.

"Next up is, Number 6!" Benson called. "OOOOOOOH! Lucky number 6!" Rigby said. "But what if it wasn't random? What if we write the exact same number on every slip of paper, pretend to have our numbers called?" Benson asked. "Lucky number 6!" Rigby picks up a gift and prepares to open it. "I wonder what it could be!" He said. "Yes, what could it be? What's something Muscle Man wouldn't want to steal, something even he would find absolutely horrible?" Rigby opens the gift. "Deodorant." Skips said. "Oooh, a new tie!" Pops said. "A Hugstable doll?" Fives asked. "Close, but no." Benson said. A salad bowl and spoon appear.

"Aww, salad accessories?" Rigby asked. "Yes, salad accessories! It's a known fact that Muscle Man hates anything salad related." Benson said. "Ahhhh!" Everyone nods. "Keep doing this gift after gift, nothing but salad accessories, until Muscle Man is the only one left in the game who hasn't stolen anything..." Muscle Man makes a sour motion. "...leaving him no choice but to pick the last remaining gift we set up for him. And when he goes to open the gift..." Benson said. "Yeah? Yeah?" Everyone asked.

"I don't know. I haven't thought that far ahead." The others groan. "That plan of yours is a good start, I'm surprised, Benson. I didn't know you were capable of something so devious." (Y/n) smirks, and so does Benson. "I'll take that as a compliment." He said. "I already bought all the salad stuff. We just need to find something that will make the worst possible gift for Muscle Man." Benson said. "Hmm hmm. With pleasure." Mordecai said. "Yeah, we could totally do that, you'll help too, right (Y/n)?" Rigby asked her, and she nods. "You bet. Sounds fun." She smirks. "Speaking of which, Muscle Man hasn't given you a bad gift in a while. I wonder why." Rigby said. "Hmm, you're right." Skips said. "Maybe he has a soft spot for her or something?" Pops said,

and (Y/n) scoffs at that. "A soft spot? Muscle Man? Get real, Pops." (Y/n) said, and Pops only shrugs. "Eh, I suppose it's possible..." Fives mused. "Alright then. Let's split up and get shopping. We're out for revenge here, people, so go, go, go!" Benson shouted. Later they're at a shop called Naughty 9 Cent. Fives can be heard laughing. Inside, he picks a can of tuna from a food aisle. Pops is with him. "What about this? Can't get any worse than expired tuna." Fives said. "Isn't that a bit much?" Pops asked. "No way! Remember what he did to you at last year's White Elephant?" Fives asked. He has a flashback to last year, where Pops' got a ship in a bottle as a gift.