WARNING!
This Chapter contains mature scenes that may be disturbing and not suitable to some readers.
Reader discretion is advised.
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Ishamar's POV
Napangiwi ako nang maramdaman ang hapdi matapos magalaw ng doctor ang sugat sa aking likuran. Kapwa lang kami tahimik sa loob ng kwarto habang ginagamot nito ang mga sugat kong natamo mula kay Heze.
Matapos ang gabing iyon na may pinatay ako rito mismo sa aking kwarto ay hindi na nga nagpadala ng kung sino si Heze sa aking kwarto. Ang alam ko lang ay nagigising na lang ako sa sakit sa tuwing humahampas ang belt ni Heze sa aking katawan. Madalang lang ang pagdating niya at madalas ay nasa bandang alas dos na sa tingin ko ay madaling araw, at palagi siyang nakatuxedo, halatang galing siya sa trabaho.
Hindi ko alam kung ilang araw ang lumipas na ganu'n ang naging routine namin, malayong-malayo na nakasanayan kong pagtrato niya sa akin. Ramdam ko lang ang aking katawan na masakit at nanginginig ang aking katawan sa lamig.
Madalas naman kapag wala si Heze ay sumasakit ang ulo ko dahil sa sarili kong boses sa aking isip na panay ang paninisi sa mga desisyon ko, pero kalaunan ay naririnig ko naman ang boses ni Heze na bumubulong sa likod ng aking tainga. Panay ang pag-uulit nito sa salitang, "reflect". So I can't do anything but think a lot of things like...
"Will I be able to survive this place?"
"What will happen to me tomorrow?"
And sometimes I can't help but to wonder...
"Why does Heze doing this to me?"
And so on.
Whenever I opened my eyes, I was in the dark and I could feel Heze's belt kissing my skin. And when I closed my eyes, I was still in the dark with my whole body trembling in pain. I totally lost my sense of time. I don't know how much hours have passed and I can't even see the sun nor moon outside my window since I can't move my body even for an inch.
Pero isang araw ay nagising na lang ako na may doctor na malayang nakakalabas-pasok sa aking kwarto. Araw-araw itong bumibisita para gamutin ang mga sugat ko, bukod pa roon ay para imonitor din ang dati kong sugat sa ulo at ang kanan kong kamay. Sa ngayon ay um-okay na ang sugat ko sa ulo at pwede ko na rin daw maigalaw ng maayos ang kanan kong kamay.
And on top of all of that... since this doctor came into my room... Heze stops coming.
"Your wounds are healing normally," pag-iimporma ni Rich, ang doctor ko, matapos niyang mapalitan ang mga bandages. "But, you said you're still suffering from unbearable headache then in the middle of the night you're having a fever, aren't you?"
Tumango naman ako bilang pagtugon at napahawak sa aking ulo. "But after taking some sleeping pills it'll go away," sagot ko. "But I'm running out of it."
"What?!" gulat niyang tanong at kinuha ang bote sa ibabaw ng bedside table. Napasinghap naman siya nang makita ang laman nu'n at pinanlisikan ako ng mata. "How much of that some are you taking for your headache to go away?"
"Five. No. I guess ten—"
"Are you killing yourself?!" malakas niyang asik pero kalauna'y napabuntong-hininga at binigyan din naman ako ng bagong bote ng sleeping pills. "Don't take too much if don't needed. You don't wanna die, aren't you?" singhal niya na tinanguan ko.
"But if you're afraid that I'll kill myself, then why did you gave me another bottle?"
"That can't be helped," mabilis niyang sagot at tumingin sa apat na sulok ng malawak na kwarto. "I want to suggest that you need fresh air and sunlight since it was too much stress that causes that headache of yours, but... someone says that you can't leave this room so we'll stick onto the pill."
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