Confusion (Sequel to I Wish...)

Chapter 58

(Becca's pov)
-7pm-
Justin's ordering soup for dinner off the room service menu. I'm resting on the couch while watching him. Ryan and Chaz are picking up my medicine.
"Ok bae, it's on the way."
Justin sat beside me and put his arm around me. I rested against him, wincing in the process.
"Justin, are you gonna get fired?"
I asked against his chest.
"I'm not sure. But I'm not letting you leave again."
He stroked my hair as Ryan and Chaz entered.
"We've got your medicine. Here, it says one a day."
Ryan handed me a pill and a glass of water. I took it then leaned against Justin again.
I'm scared. I keep thinking about Max, Selena, but not so much Chantel. Max is my biggest fear. He's everywhere, in my dreams, in my thoughts. Justin could me right beside me, and I'll still be scared to death. I can't sleep at night. I'm scared. He's there.
"It's here, baby. You want me to share with you?"
Justin broke my thoughts. He was carrying Lobster Bisque, my favorite.
"Yea."
I swallowed hard and nodded.
"You take the first bite."
He offered so I took a bite. I smiled and let him taste it.
We ate as Ryan and Chaz headed out. They said that they'll visit soon.
"You wanna take a bath?"
Justin asked after we finished the bowl of soup. I nodded then used him to stand up. He led me into the bathroom. I limped a little from my twisted ankle. Justin picked me up and set me on the counter while he set up a warm bath.
"Relax yourself, baby."
Justin took off his shirt. I nodded and bit my lip.
"That's not relaxing."
He untucked my bottom lip from my teeth with his thumb. I smiled shyly and let him take my shirt off.
"Relax."
He whispered soothingly in my ear. I nodded and took off my shorts. Justin stripped all the way down, so I did too.
"Why are you so tense, baby?"
Justin put his hand on my shoulder when we sat in the tub.
"It's not easy to relax, you know?"
I muttered, a little upset.
"Hey, it's ok. Don't get upset, baby doll."
Justin kissed my temple. He soaked my hair with warm water and massaged it with shampoo.
"Enjoy the moment. Everything's ok."
He rinsed off the shampoo then kissed my temple. Justin washed his hair too; then we stepped out of the tub. He wrapped me in a towel and himself in a towel too.
Justin handed me a fresh pair of panties and one of his black shirts. I changed into them; then Justin motioned me to lay down.
"I'm gonna sing to you."
He smiled and tucked me in bed. I smiled and stared in his chocolatey smooth eyes.
"When I met you, girl, my heart went knock, knock. Now them butterflies in my stomach won't stop, stop..."
Justin sang One Time, making me smile widely. He's so beautiful, and it's unstoppable. Justin pecked my temple then joined me in bed. I cuddled close to him and closed my eyes.
-11pm-
I stared at the ceiling above me in bed. Justin's slightly snoring beside me. He's knocked out for good. He's in a deep sleep; I'm not.
I can't sleep. Max is everywhere. I see him. I'm scared.
I swear I see a shadow by the doorway. I swear I see it. I'm not paranoid. I see Max.
"Becca."
I swear I hear things too. That's when I freaked out, panicked, whatever. I lost all my focus and started shaking. I feel like I'm being choked and my eyes are begging to let out the tears.
"Becca, Becca! No no no, baby. Breathe. Can you breathe?"
Justin's voice was heard, and I could see him facing me in the darkness.
"Becca, breathe. In...out...in...out. Yea, that's it. Calm down."
Justin managed to calm me down, but I started crying and hugged him close.
"Becca, shit, don't do that to me. What happened?"
He hugged back and breathed in relief.
"I saw him."
I broke the hug to point shakily to the doorway. Justin turned on the lights and looked around the whole room. Nothing.
"Maybe you're just paranoid, baby. Can you sleep ok?"
Justin dried my eyes.
"No."
I told him the honest truth.
"I'll stay up with you."
He turned on the tv and held me close.
-6am-
Justin and I stayed up all night. Justin's exhausted and it's all my fault. I told him its ok if he sleeps, but he declined and stayed awake for me.
"Baby, are you hungry?"
Poor Justin. He's so tired.
"Justin, you need to rest."
I pulled on his arm to get in bed.
"No, Becca, I'm fine."
He declined again but moved inside the covers.
"I'll get Ryan and Chaz over. You need sleep, baby."
I'm exhausted myself, but I can't sleep. I'm scared of having another panic attack. I'm scared of Max.
"Oh, ok, babygirl."
Justin finally gave in and shut his eyes. I went next door to Ryan and Chaz's and knocked.
"Ugh, what time is it? Becca, hey, what's up?"
Chaz opened the door, shirtless and half awake.
"Can you guys come over? I can't sleep and Justin needs rest."
I mumbled tiredly.
"Yea, sure. Let me get Ryan."
Chaz went inside and I went back into our room. I sat on the couch and put my head in my hands.
"So Justin and you stayed up all night?"
Chaz walked in with Ryan.
"Yea, how'd you know?"
I looked at them.
"It sounds like something Justin would do."
Chaz shrugged.
"Why can't you sleep?"
Ryan plopped beside me.
"I'm scared."
I mumbled, not wanting to think about Max.
"Why?"
But they have the right to know.
"I don't wanna have another panic attack."
Was all I said. It's not a lie, because Max is part of the reason why I freaked out last night.
"Damn, and you know Justin gets scared when that happens."
Chaz took a seat beside me too.
"I don't know what to do."
I narrowed my eyes at the cast on my hand.
"Well, not sleeping at all won't solve the problem."
Ryan spoke both jokingly and sadly.
"I know."
I mumbled and sighed in distress.
"Here, take your pills."
Chaz got up and handed me my prescription bottle and some Advil.
"Thanks."
I took one of each then set them aside.
"Are you hungry?"
They Ryan as Chaz grabbed the menu.
"A little."
I mumbled and forced my eyes to stay open.
"Bro, let's get French toast and order pancakes for..."
Ryan and Chaz buzzed on, but I'm too tired. All I can do is cross my fingers that I don't see Him in my dreams or anywhere.
-9am-
-Becca's Dream-
I was waiting for Justin to pick me up. He called me for ice cream. When his car finally arrived, I opened the passenger door. There I didn't see Justin. I saw Max. He pulled me in and drove off. I screamed and kicked, but I couldn't move. There wasn't anything holding me down, it's like I was paralyzed. Max laughed and pulled me into a big, empty room.
"I killed him."
Max snickered and came at me with a bloody knife. Right then I realized he killed Justin. I screamed as Max laughed again. He pressed the knife into my throat...but I'm not dead. I looked around to see myself surrounded my mirrors with Max gone. I'm not Becca. I'm Justin. That's when I see my throat slit; then I'm back to being Becca. It's over.
-end of dream-
My eyes flip open to feel my body screaming at me. My head is all over the place, and I can't focus on anything. All I can hear and see is Ryan and Chaz telling me to breathe. I feel like crying, but I have to calm down first.
"Becca, it's ok. Whatever it was, it's over."
I wasn't listening. I just started crying into whoever was closest to me, which was Chaz.
See? I told them I'm scared to go to sleep. I'm terrified. I don't ever want to see Max again. If I do, I might give myself a heart attack right there, literally.

(A/N: 16 freaking days! I can't wait! Next post is on Friday)

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