RUDE BOY

Forgive

Jay Paris p.o.v

Yesterday really stressed me to the max. I was very hurt. Not because I always had the assumption in the back of my head that Steven was always and will always be a bullshitter but because I came all this way for him for nothing. I cared enough to the my own breaking point were I took everyone's word for it to finally talk to Steven and make things right. Maybe I was too late. I just wanted to talk to Nakita today to vent. Say a couple of things to get off my chest. 

I'm happy she's home today. She fed me a sandwich that only she could perfect. 

"You ok?", she asked.

"Better."

"Hmm, well I guess that's better than no."

"He seems so stupid, like why all that for nothing bro?"

"I think there's more than that. Maybe he was just as tired as you were and decided like 'fuck him he'll never come through', you know?"

"He had years to say that bullshit. I think he's just a pussy ass nigga and he was just being irrelevant for attention. Like what if he doesn't even remember why he's mad at me anymore. He's just mad because I don't like him."

"I can concur, but I don't think that he was ready to talk to you. Maybe he forgotten what was supposed to happen when you finally give in and just wanted to let out all that anger out from being rejected."

"True. I don't know what to do though. I did my part, and he didn't even take it."

"That is so unlike Steven."

"That is so stupid."

"OK well that too but come on there has to be more. Its getting under my skin just as much as yours. Like don't you wish he would've gave you more detail?"

"I wish that he would just pull up Google Maps and try and locate the fucking logic and everything he said."

"Ahaha, exactly."

"This doesn't add up at all."

"Well what's done is done... Don't stress about it and become just like what he used to be. Nagging you to death just to talk to him and find out in the end you don't even know what you want anymore. You just enjoyed the adventure but you don't take the treasure."

"Yeah."

"What about me and you though?"

I was so shocked she asked me that. "What do you mean?", I asked.

"I didn't mean to say that."

"It's just a question don't back out."

"I know, but I said it too soon."

"No you said it right on time. However, the answer is whatever you want it to be."

"What do you mean?"

"I know what I did, I know to you when I hurt you I was the most terrible, neglectful, lier you've ever known. I thought I deserved a second chance but I was wrong. I don't deserve anything. And now as I'm on the subject I'm starting to think that I deserve what happened to me today with Steven. I shut him out all those years and pretended to be someone else as he did everything in his power to get me to even look at him. Then when he finally thought it was over, I finally came to talk. In his mind he was frustrated, he was depressed, and most of all over the fact that he couldn't get me back. Brother or not. So now I come to realize that if I can't give a second chance to someone more important who has been here first all my life, then why should I receive one?"

"Oh my goodness, Jay."

"Go out with him."

"What?"

"He likes you. I know so, you should be his girl. Until I get myself together I don't want you taking pity for me and try and get back with me. Ok?"

"Wait!"

I began to head out her house, she grabbed my arm at the thrush hole, "I'll be fine."

I snatched my arm out of her grip and headed to work. She stood on the steps watching me drive away. A tear ran down my face. 

I'm finally pr