letting go (b.beckham)

chapter four

a l l i s o n

i am back in la and its been a week since i saw brooklyn.
and yes, i know i am supposed to stay in las vegas for a
month but i dont know my brother told me to just go
back here in la and i dont get him why. its okay to me
that i'll stay here alone but to him?? idk he only allows
me to be alone for 2-3 days but for a month?? nope.

i am going to go back to school tomorrow.
ugh. i hate school so much. its really annoying and i cant even
concentrate. i am so so so pissed rn. i am not like this before, i
used to be excited about school but now??? i really hate it ugh

especially now.. the whole vegas trip was awkward, very very
awkward. who would love a trip like that?! ugh that was so
stressful. i didnt enjoy it though. thank god im back home but
school... ugh freaking hell.

and btw, i am kinda proud of myself. since i saw brooklyn with
holly, i finally decided to move on. to forget him. since that day,
i stopped stalking him. i stopped looking at his social media
accounts and so far, i am doing it right. yes, i think this is the
start. i am so proud of myself. lol.

..

its monday...

i checked the time. fuck. its 9:26 am.
school's going to start at 10. fuck. im
so dead!! ugh im late again, for sure.

i took a very very quick shower and wore random
clothes i saw in my closet. ugh, i am always late &
that's not good. it can affect my grades which is bad.

(ootd photo attached)

i grabbed my bag and ran to the kitchen to get some
water. i have no time to eat breakfast anymore.

i am drinking my water when suddenly...

"do you usually go to school late?"

a guy said.

i turned around and literally choked my water.

"what are you doing here?!" i said, kinda loud

he laughed.

"chill." he said

"didnt your brother tell you? im staying her for the next few months" he said before drinking his water.

its brooklyn. its him. what the heck.
i am trying to move on and now, he's
here. he's going to stay here with us.
for the next few months. fuck it. fuck.

"no way!!" i said

"yup. so answer my question, do you usually go to school late?" he said, laughing

i dont know what to do shit.
i am so uncomfortable. fuck
his beautiful laugh, his smile,
his eyes, his lips, his voice.
oh my god!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"n...no" i said, avoiding eye contact

"but your brother told me you should leave before 10 and its..." he checked his watch

"its 10:26" he said, smiling

i checked my watch.

"fuck." i shouted, he laughed.

i remember the first time he hear me curse
he laughed for like an hour and he cant get
over it. he's even asking me to curse again
and he told me that he likes it when u curse
and he keeps on.. wait, no allie. STOP.

i grabbed my bag.

i am looking for my car keys.
ugh where is it.

"are you looking for your keys? well, your brother told me to tell you that he borrowed your car cause his car isnt working" he said.

"are you serious?!" i said, close to crying.

"yeah."

"oh my god" i said, wiping water in my eye

"do you want me to drive you to school?" he asked

i really need a ride but this wont help me.

"no.. no thanks. i'll just walk" i said

"are you sure?" he asked

"you're gonna be so late, and i can tal-" i cut him off

"no no, seriously. bye!" i said and i ran away

omg. i cant do this anymore. school is being such a crap
and now brooklyn's going to stay with us. omg this cant
happen. i am so pissed. i hate my life so much. why do
i even need to experience this bullshits. i am so done. all
i want is to be happy, but a lot of shits wont allow me to
be happy. i hate this world. i feel like i don't belong here.

while walking i decided to text my brother cause i he's so annoying.

allie
- so why the heck didnt you tell me that brooklyn's going to stay with us for the next few months?! I HATE YOU SO MUCH
aaron
- correction, only with you.
allie
- what do you mean!!!
aaron
- you know, i need to stay here in vegas for a month right? so you're going to be with him alone, for a month.
allie
- are you serious!! i hate you!!!
aaron
- i love u too pls be good to him. talk to him. make him feel at home ok?

what the fuck. this is so annoying!!!!!!!!

i realized that i left my mac.
fuck. omg. i have like billion
files about brooklyn there. all
the video edits i made since
we broke up, all the notes and
pictures. omg no, no.

but its in my closet so i really hope he'll not see it.

-
b r o o k l y n

its my first day here in la, and la is amazing.
i am staying at aaron's and this house is huge.

i laughed to hard this morning cause of allie.
her reaction when she saw me lol. she even
choke her water i love scaring people. she looks
so scared and shocked. lol. i love scaring people
so much, its my hobby lol

i decided to call my girlfriend, holly.

"hey baby" i said

"i miss you so much, brookie"

"aw baby, i miss you too. we'll see each other soon okay?" i assured her.

"i love you. be good there okay? i trust you." she said

"yes babe, i love you"

"okay i gotta go. im sleepy" she said

the call ended.

i dont know what to do anymore. im so bored.

i decided to check out the whole house.
damn, this house is huge for two people
well, now we're three cause i'll live here
for the next few months.

while roaming around i saw an open door.
well, im sure this is allie's room.

i went to close it but then i saw something
that shocked me. her messy, unorganized
room. this shocked me cause she's not like this.

she always clean her things, she doesnt
even want any single dirt in her things. but
look at her room now, all these clothes on the
floor, all these empty bottled water, her messy
bed, her unorganized study table.

i swear, this is not allie. she is not like this. she
is the cleanest person i know. she even help me
organize and clean my things before.

i decided to clean some stuffs in her room.
she might hate me for touching her things
but im bored and her room is so messy.

while cleaning her closet, i saw her macbook.
i decided to open it and check it. lol, i know
its bad but she'll never know lol.

i was checking it out and saw an album that says.

"DO NOT OPEN THIS FILE"

but since i am so curious i clicked it.

whats up with this album...

i was about to click the files inside
when suddenly my phone rang.

an: hey guys!!! hope u like this chapter lol ;););)