Chase Me || Calum Hood

2.5

{Delilah}.

Do you ever wish you could just turn everything off, to stop everything and not have to feel anything? To slip someplace in between life and death where nothing can hurt you? My meltdown was three days ago and I haven't been in to see Calum since. I've barely spoken a word but then again, I don't feel the need to. The only person I want to speak to is him, but I don't trust myself to do so. I'm too scared to hurt him again.

He still lies there weak and untouched and I wonder if he can notice my absence. I don't even know if I want him to be able to here me, I don't know what I want anymore. Nothing is right and it seems like nothing ever will be again. The all too familiar question of 'why Calum?' still lingers on everyone's mind, though I know that we'll never get an answer. I just wish it was me instead.

I'm acting cold and distant to everyone and I don't know how to stop or be even the slightest bit like my normal self. Luke's done all he can to get me to see Calum, but in the end, its down to me. I wasn't going to tell him, but I overheard him talking to Ashton and I just know that no one wanted me to know what they were saying. I understand now why they didn't want me to know as the thought is eating me alive, playing on every doubt I have.

"Every day he doesn't wake up, the chances of him surviving are weaker."

What if he doesn't wake up? I seriously need to prepare myself for this; I might lose him. I think I already am.

-

{Calum}.

My body shook continuously, flashing images before me all of the last thing I remember. It was that night again, the one where Delilah took off and I chased after her. My mind wouldn't let me rest, instead it tormented me, visions of what happened replaying over and over.

It was almost unbearable and each time I saw the car coming towards me, I was awaiting the pain to strike every inch of me, shattering my bones and bruising my body. It never came, but each time seemed as real as the first, taking the breath right out from me.

'How on earth do I wake up? Am I just going to be stuck on this bed, practically lifeless until everyone gives up?' I asked myself. Then the question struck me. Is everyone just waiting for me to give up?

What if I was dying? Peacefully and unaware, slowly dying? What if I can't wake up?

All the loneliness was making it hard to fight. I wish she was here.

It felt like it had been ages since she was beside me, days or maybe a week even. It couldn't be right though, could it? She wouldn't go. Time just passed slowly without her near.

I realised that no one was telling me how to wake up, they were sort of just expecting me to know how to. I needed someone to ask, someone who could change something; a God? I'd never prayed before in my life, not with meaning anyway. Back at school, I just bowed my head and stayed silent when the teacher prayed - not really paying attention to much of what anyone was saying.

But could God hear me? That was the ultimate question. Or does he only hear from the living and the dead - not those someplace in between. What if I was out of reach by God?

I knew I had nothing to lose either way. Well I did, but it seemed that at this stage I was already losing everything. I couldn't clasp my hands together like you're meant too - I hope it still counted. I hope that whoever was up there controlling everything could hear me.

'I need to wake up but I don't know how to. If you can hear me, please help me.' I whispered. A hand rested on top of mine as I began praying. For a moment there I didn't know who's it was, but when I realised, I could breathe a little easier.

She came back to me.

-

Just a quick update that I hope you like.

In the comment section, leave your thoughts about what you think is going to happen so I can see how many of you are thinking the same thing!

Thank you for all the comments on the last chapter. I'm almost at 10,000 reads in just under a month! Lets say 30+ comments for the next chapter.