Slytherin Pride

Explaining

Draco's POV

I sighed. I knew I shouldn't have even mentioned this to hermione, let alone a physical and definitely emotionally unstable Ginny. But here we are all gathered around on my hospital bed, waiting for me to tell the story. "Ok well, maybe an hour after I blacked out, I really don't know, voices started to whisper in my head. I thought it was just side effects and I wasn't completely unconscious yet, but it turns out, you still have a conscious when your in a light coma. The voices started to become more distinct and then altered into one high pitched drugged voice. My aunt. She just laughed quietly in my ears and hummed the tune to my favorite songs when I was little at first, but the she got more real and began asking questions. 'Why don't you just die Draco?' 'Who is stopping you?' I didn't answer, because at first I didn't know how but then as the time lengthened I didn't want to sound stupid for one, but also, I didn't know what to say back. I wanted to say In full confidence. 'Because I have people that love me!' But I didn't want her to find out who they were, and frankly I didn't entirely believe some of them did." I paused for a second, letting go them soak up all the information and news before going on. "I never answered her questions, so she went on what she knew based in me. 'What if your mother was strangled to death with all the lies you told her. About you, about your father, about you loving her?' I remember she would the show a terrified face of my mothers, silently crying as I screamed my hate for her out loud in my head. The image is still replaying. I guess I was sweating during this time, because I could faintly feel the nerves in my finger tips move in what felt like a pool of water as I came to, for a short moment. It was the time hermione and two other people were standing over me." Ginny interrupted. "So...you didn't ever talk back?" I hesitated. "Um...not about any of you..." Ginny's eyes narrowed. "Who then?" I sighed not quite meeting her eyes. "Me." She almost slapped me, and I flinched away. Granger was on the edge of her seat as well, clinching and unflinching her fists. Then she spoke rapidly. "Do you know what harm you could've put on yourself?! Now in your dreams...they'll be nothing but torture!" I rolled my eyes. "Ooohhh. Gee because I never have dreams like that, good thing I can just wake up and be ok...oh wait. I can't!" She dropped her gaze, softening it in the process. "Sorry...I just meant you'll be lucky if you ever close an eyelid after this." I just nodded, a little fed up. "Look, sorry for disturbing you. I'm sorry my life and situation is scary...I didn't mean to upset you all. So...I'm going to try to eat and y'all should go to class." Gin stood abruptly up, nearly falling and thundered out of the room. Hermione stood looking resentfully at me. "You know you saying that to her will probably result in her self harming right?" And then without even a glare or a flick of the wrist she walks out, not even glancing back to see my reaction. To be honest. I'm glad she didn't see it, because it was so tear choked and sickly looking I almost couldn't look at it.

Ginny's POV
I turned the corned sharply and collapsed. I needed food, my tongue felt so dry it could crack. My arms were now shaking uncontrollably. I thought since Draco had woken up again, I could stop worrying and could finally eat without wanting to puke, but now I felt worse than before and my vision was only getting worse. He won't tell me what's going on! Of course he won't. Look at me. He doesn't think I can handle it and frankly I'm not too sure myself, but at least I would know. Knowing is better than thinking up a hundred awful possibilities on my own. I need something sharp. To relieve my pain. I need water...food...relief. I lightly rub the ground with my fingertips. They tingle, trying to pick up and sense of touch, but they've gone numb from lack of use. Hermione rounded the corner. "Draco shouldn't have said that. Don't cut..." I was only sure of one thing. I was fed up with her shit as well. "Who said you could talk to me? I hate you. And your sorry shitty magic too." She sighed. "Ginny I've done everything I can...I don't know what else to do...I-" I became so angry I could just cry. She didn't understand what I was mad at. I can't say I was on top of my speech as I continue. "IM NOT MAD AT YOU FOR THAT YOU WORTHLESS SLUT! IM MAD, AND HURT. AND TOTALLY WRECKED BECAUSE DRACO TALKS TO YOU. HE DOESNT THINK I CAN HANDLE ANYTHING AND YET HERE YOU ARE PROTECTING HIM AND ME FROM EACH OTHER. MISS. PERFECT. I WISH I COULD JUST DRAIN ALL OF MY EMOTIONS INTO MAGIC! I WISH I WASNT MISSING A BROTHER! THAT I WAS A MUGGLE. THAT I WASNT IN LOVE. THAT I DIDNT STRESS. THAT I WASNT FUCKED UP. IM JEALOUS OF HOW GOOD YOU ARE!" I hit my face as hard as possible on the cement floor drawing blood from my nose. But I don't care. Hermione had a steady flow of tears coming from her eyes as she pulled me off the floor so I would stop hitting face. Instead I slammed my head into a wall. Sticky blood drew from my forehead. "GINNY STOP! STOP PLEASE!" I was sobbing tearlessly. "I want to leave this place! I want to go! Please! Help me!" I flung myself at the floor again but a gasp and a pair of strong arms picked my up and held me in midair. I sobbed and continued trying to stop breathing and fight, but the arms were firm and comforting. "Shh-hhhh." That voice. I tilted my bleeding head to see a very pale Draco holding me and crying silently. "I don't want to h-have to go through this g-Ginny." I couldn't meet his eyes and my headache had tripled in intensity. "I know." I croak. He wasn't hugging me. But just holding me in the air and shaking. He kissed my cheek and finally set me down. He wasn't being sympathetic though. He looked extremely stressed and tired. I felt almost ashamed. I felt like a child, unhappy with the flavor of candies she got. It wasn't as simple as that of course, but seeing how other people react to it makes me feel...embarrassed? I didn't know but for some reason or another I replied. "Sorry. For your trouble getting here." And limped away with my shoulders squared.

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