Mixed Feelings

Finally Happy..... For Now

When we were in the car, that Paul was driving, the only thing that could be heard was the heavy breathing puffing out of my lungs due to how scared I was.

Whenever Harry got mad it was scary. He was scary. His eyes would turn black, and he would ball his fists so tight you could see the white of his knuckles. Especially when he started hitting, he wouldn't stop until someone was on the floor; it was never Harry.

When the car came to a stop, I realized that we had reached the house. Harry was the first one out of the car. But since I was dizzy from all the drinks I had, I had a bit of a hard time getting out. I almost fell if it weren't for Zayn who caught me.

"Thanks." I said shyly. Even though we were best friends again it was still a little awkward between us. That's why I've been avoiding. Again I've been having weird thoughts about him and me.

I stumbled into the house with the four other boys trailing behind me. I noticed Harry wasn't in the living room. I checked in the kitchen and nope. He was probably in his room.

I made my way back to the living room and the boys were sat on the couch. I walked over to them and sat/fell onto Niall's lap. Niall responded by putting his arm around my waist so I wouldn't fall. I knew it was only a friendly gesture so I didn't think much of it. I placed my head on Niall's shoulder and started to doze off, but I still heard their conversation.

"What do you think happened?" Louis asked

"I have no idea..." I think Zayn responded.

"I do..." I barley whispered.

I raised my head up to see all the boys looking at me for an explanation about the bar fight that happened only a few hours ago.

"The bartender guy at the club tried to hit on me when I went to go get another drink. I said 'no', of course, but he wouldn't take no for an answer. Our little argument went on for another five minutes until Harry saw that he was hurting me and told him off then hit him." I explained.

"What do you mean he hurt you?" Liam asked

"He grabbed onto my arm trying to make me stay and say 'yes' to him."

I leaned onto Niall's shoulder again.

"Niall?" I whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Can you take me up to my room please?" I asked.

I was too tired and I just wanted to change into comfortable clothes and just relax and spend time with my boys.

Niall picked me up and walked towards my room and opened the door to my room and placed me on my bed.

"Thanks." I said as he walked out.

I made my way into my bathroom, without falling finally, and took off my dress and shoes and put on the pair of sweats I stole from Zayn a couple of days ago and stood there. In sweats and my pink Victoria Secret Bra. I was frozen to the spot. Not knowing what to do. Finally I found myself making my way to the scale nearby.

I knew i was going to regret getting on it but I knew I had to. I waited a little bit until I was the numbers. I was shocked to see that I only wieghed 89. lbs. I thought I wieghed more. A smile crept on my face at the thought of being skinny. But those thoughts quickly vanised. The voice inside my head telling me that it was all a lie. That I was never going to be skinny.

I got off the scale and went downstairs to see the guys sitting on the couch and watching television.

"Really you guys?" I said.

"What? we're tired!" Zayn complained.

"The one day I want to stay up and NOT sleep you guys want to sleep? What the hell?" I said a little surprised that they were tired usually it was me. I am known to sleep for long periods of time.