A Crazy Lil Thing Called LOVE || L.P.

99.) I can't do it.

"Sometimes it's not the butterflies that tell you you're in love,

But the pain....!!"

*19th August (2 months and 4 days later)*

Liam's P.O.V.

Me and the lads were sitting in the studio, having our coffee and the scene in that room was total chaos; Each one of us was speaking at the same time and literally, nobody could make out what the other person was trying to say.

The room is filled with nothing but, the positive vibes and everybody seems to be too happy after so long. It, actually, feels great!

"One at at time, guys!" Zayn shouted at the top of his voice, making the rest of us to shut up and we let out a soft laugh.

"I was saying that I'm very happy for you, bro." Niall was the first one to speak. "Thank you, bro." Zayn nodded and both of them exchanged smiles.

"I still cannot believe she said yes to a douche like you!" The moment those words left Louis' mouth, the room echoed with the sound of laughter and Harry, almost spit out his coffee.

Everybody was too elated and surprised to learn that Zayn had proposed to Perrie the other day and she said yes. Zayn was all in smiles and chuckles while the rest of us continued teasing him.

A sudden thought crossed my mind and I recalled the time when I had proposed to Alya and how everyone was over me when I told them she had said yes, just like we were mocking Zayn at that point of time.

Alya.

It'd been like two months since she left back for India and I never heard anything from her since then. No pictures, no updates. Absolutely no news about her. Even the boys didn't mention her ever since I told them that I didn't want to hear her name or anything related to her.

The first month after she left, I was a complete mess. When my anger had cooled down a bit, I did call her up a few times but it went straight into her voice-mail, every single time. My texts weren't getting delivered and the messages that I sent to her on twitter, she never replied to them. She hadn't even tweeted anything since then. I doubt she would've even cared to read my texts.

Also, the performances at the award shows and other social events added up to the pile of mess in my life. I had to pull up a strong face in front of everyone so as to assure them that I was doing fine while my heart used to bleed inside, breaking into pieces every time a thought regarding Alya crossed my mind.

Gradually, I had gotten used to live with the pain. I had to. It wasn't like I had some other choice. Also, alcohol and smoking helped me in getting through the miserable phase of my life. I'd finally stopped crying myself to sleep, knowing the fact that Alya clearly didn't want me in her life anymore.

I used to indulge myself in anything that could help me in diverting my mind from the thoughts of Alya but I failed, every time. Random girls at the parties tried to get some from me but even if I tried, I just couldn't get Alya out of mind. I used to feel like I was cheating on her and so, I ended up brushing off every female who tried to get intimate with me.

I guess the guilt is still, somewhere, stuck at the back of my head and I don't think I can ever forgive myself for how the things have ended between me and Alya. I could've prevented everything from falling apart if I'd taken some action at the right time but....