Past Life

Chapter 8-Done

"What do you think you're doing? You're committing a suicide!" Rake shouted at me at the top of his lungs.

"Don't shout at me! Come on! I am there with something on my mind!"

"What's in your mind? To put yourself in danger? Kung wala ako dun, ano na lang mangyayari sa'yo? You can't defeat the killer. You're too weak for him." I felt a pinch in my throat. So he did save me because he thinks I'm weak.

"I know what you're thinking. I need your heroic stunts cause I'm weak right?" I hesitated to ask him, but what can I do? Natanong ko na. He paused for a while. Please say no. Please.

"Yes." Natigilan ako sa sinabi niya. "Dahil sinong matinong tao ang susugod doon at haharapin ang isang kriminal ng wala man lang kalaban-laban. Stupidity." I felt my throat dry. Goodness I can't take this! How could he tell these things to me?

"Really? Stupidity? And do you think I'm stupid enough para pasukin yung bahay na yun? Goodness, no! Remember, you tell me na konektado ang underground pool at fountain? Then I heard a splash. I heard the screams sa baba. Malamang sa underground nanggaling yun. At ano yung splash? Of course it's water! Upon looking at the house, may lumabas sa fountain but I can't recognize what is it. It's dark. But I'm sure na kung ano man ang bagay na yun, galing yun sa victim. He's trying to give as an evidence! Magkakaroon na sana tayo ng bagong ebidensya! But what did you do? You ruined it!" My gosh pulang pula na ko sa inis.

"Hindi ko na isip yun." Hindi mo talaga maiisip yun dahil hindi ka nag-iisip!

"Maybe because only WEAK ONES can think of those things." I emphasized the word WEAK. Tss.

I walked out and I don't dare to look back. Gosh! He is worse than I think! I took a bus to get me home. Nabigla pa rin ako sa mga pangyayari. Hindi ko na yata kakayanin kung may susunod pa. Umupo ako sa harapan ng bus, yung seat na hindi sa bintana. Naaalala ko lang yung duguan kamay sa tuwing titingin ako dun. When I got home, my father is waiting for me.

"Bakit ngayon ka lang?" He asked me in a calm voice. He's not angry, nagpaalam naman ako.

"I...uhm.." What's the point of lying? He can sense chemicals in my brain. He will know if I lie.

"Your brain is releasing Glucocorticoids and Cortisol. Are you nervous, shocked or stress? Sweetie, tell me, what happened?" I can't help it. I burst into tears.

"Dad, I just.. I just saw a crime. Wala man lang ako nagawa. I'm worthless Dad. That kid is asking for help!" My dad was shocked pero nakarecover siya agad.

"Sweetie." Hinaplos niya yung buhok ko. "It's not your fault. Actually, I'm thankful. Kung sumugod ka dun, ikaw ang mapapahamak. I can't fathom the idea of you, leaving us." That melts my heart. My father really loves me. "Go to your room now. I know you're tired. I love you."

~~

Kinabukasan, umakyat ako sa room namin. I searched for vacant seats. At kung minamalas ka nga naman, there are two vacant seats. One is beside Lee, and one is beside Rake. So where will I sit? Sa tabi ng lalaking pinagpalit agad ako o sa tabi ng lalaking kinaiinisan ko? Pero kahit saan pa ang piliin ko, hindi magiging maganda ang kakalabasan.

"Ms. Arkhams, you're disturbing my class. Please take a seat." Sabi nung Math teacher ko. I sighed. I looked at Rake na nakatingin din sa'kin, agad akong umiwas ng tingin. Awkward.

Then I took a seat.

Dahil alam ko na normal lang yung ginawa niya.