Everything Happens for a Reason

Part 23

It's May and I still haven't talked to Shane since March. After everything in Branson, I don't think I can handle anymore of this. I decided to text him.

*Hey. *

*Hey. *

* How are you?*

*Good I guess. You?*

*Fantastic.*

* sarcasm. Awesome. *

*sorry just haven't been the same since Branson. *

* yeah same. *

After that I just blew up on him. I couldn't stand to take it anymore. I told him how I saw him kiss her and how everything just hurt and all he could say was that he cheated on her with me so he didn't see how it was different and I told him that It was different. Well at least it was to me. I feel like a bunch of weight has been lifted off my chest when I told him. And in the end I regretted it. It felt like all of it got pointed towards me. That it was all my fault. Which I knew it wasn't but then again it felt like it was.

A couple weeks later he texted me saying he was sorry about the whole thing and that it wasn't my fault it was his. And that he didn't know what he was thinking. I knew where it was heading and I didn't know if I was ready for it yet. It wasn't the same day but it was a little after. We talked for a week and then he asked me. I still didn't know if I was ready but I said yes like I always do. After a day or two things were back to normal. Somewhat.

He would come over and hang out with me and one day he asked if I wanted to come over and hangout with him at his mema's and I asked and my mom said I could if I wanted to so that Wednesday I was ready to go over and hangout with him and he texted me and said that he wasn't ready to date and everything I kinda seen it coming but he said that I could still come over and hang out if I wanted to and I told him that I would since I already told him I would.

After school was out I met him in the hallway and we went outside and met his mema across the road and we went to the store before we went to his house. When we got to his house we went to his room and watched some TV then he got the idea to do some stuff. And things got heated and that's the day I lost my virginity. Not the way I wanted it to go but I wouldn't have changed it. After that he told me that he was going back to Miley and if he would have told me that before I probably wouldn't have done it.

The church van got there and I got on the van and he sat by Miley and I sat in the seat behind them and I seen her give him the ring back and him put it on. When we got to the church I ate and I couldn't stand it anymore. I left as soon as I got done eating. My mom talked to him and told him that I had to go to counseling because of him and just told him everything.

The next day I put my headphones in and walked straight passed him and went into class and sat in my seat and I got a text from him.

*So your not going to talk to me now? Nice, at least I know you got what you wanted.*

* Really? I didn't get what I wanted. I wanted you and I can't have that so. *

* Well I want to talk to you. *

* Talk then. *

* In person. *

* Why? *

* Forget it.*

After that class, I went straight to my other one and didn't even look for him I checked my phone to make sure he didn't text me again since I didn't reply back. But nothing. The next hour I was standing in the hallway talking to Korey and my other friend and he walked up to me.

" I need to talk to you. You two go. "

" What do you want Shane?"

" I need to talk to you. "

" I have nothing to say to you. "

I turned to walk away from him and he grabbed my arm and pulled me back.

" No no no I'm not done. Your mom told me about counseling. Was that true?"

" No I went to counseling because of anxiety. Not because of you."

"okay. "

" I have nothing else to say to you Shane. "

I walked away and I heard him laugh and say okay. When I got to class I told my friend about everything and she already knew about the day before so she was already mad. After that I didn't hear anything else from him. I was glad at the time and then after some time I was starting to miss him all over again.