Cerulean Star

Chapter 21: Long After I'm Gone

"Is it safe to assume that since you graduate today, that you've decided to head on back over to Italy?" Charlie asked me as he helped me into his cruiser. I was clutching the yellow cap and gown in my hand and wearing a three inch heel that Heidi sent over from a little shop in Venice.

I nodded my head, confirming the pain in Charlie's eyes. There was so much I wanted to tell him about how I wanted my life to be after Forks, but I couldn't. He was still in the dark, along with Felix.

It was my decision to keep Felix from knowing about James and his little army, despite his attempts of making friends with the Cullen's. They treated each other civilly, mainly because they knew how I would feel about the tension between them. But above all else, Felix was a Volturi, and no matter what his feelings for me were, he'd always be a company man. I was hoping that Demetri would call sometime soon so that I wouldn't have to mention anything to him. But I knew that even if that were to happen, there would still be some explaining that I'd need to do.

Charlie and I rode to the school in silence, he was probably contemplating how he could persuade me to stay in Forks, or at least the country. I was simply worried about the fight that I knew was coming.

"Are you leaving because of Felix? I see the way he looks at you, you know." This surprised me. Charlie liked Felix, maybe even as much as he liked Jacob, but he had never said anything to allude to that. Edward on the other hand, Charlie hated, or at least had a strong dislike.

"He's part of the reason." I answered truthfully, well at least part truthfully.

"Do you love him?"

My mouth opened to answer but I wasn't sure how to answer it. I loved him, but my feelings for him often felt that they transcended love. Felix was by far a better choice than any of my options, for one thing, he was completely devoted to me. He was protective of me, without being stupidly over-protective. And most importantly, he's never lied to me, at least from what I could tell.

"I do." Charlie nodded his head and I caught his frown righting itself into a small smile. "He asked me to marry him." The words came out without me realizing until it was too late.

Charlie's grip on the steering wheel became deathly tight, and I was afraid that it was going to snap away. "And what did you tell him?" He looked at me from the corner of his eyes, trying to judge my reaction. His voice was a bit stern from clenching his teeth.

"That I needed to finish school, and I wasn't ready for a relationship just yet anyways." Charlie's white knuckle grip loosened, and it seemed as if he started breathing again.

"Well those people you lived with raised you right I guess." He smiled at me briefly, but I could tell that he was upset that he couldn't say that he raised me.

We got out of the car when we arrived at the school, but I just kind of stood by the car. Charlie walked around the front and leaned against the car beside me. "You'll give me a heads up though if any major changes happen in your life? This ceremony seems more ominous to me than any other parent could ever imagine." I looked into Charlie's eyes, and saw a few tears building up. Emotions were hard for him to express, and he was letting them out to his regret.

"Dad, I may be leaving for Italy, but I would never forget about you. You will forever be my father. And I promise old man, if any huge life changing event happens, you'll be there. I promise." I comforted him with a hug and felt him swipe a few tears away. I truly intended on keeping this promise as much as possible.

"Alright, I gotta do some crowd control. Hurry on up." Charlie wasn't looking at me, but I followed where his eyes were anyway. Felix was walking through the crowd, though nobody really touched him. He raised his hand to wave at us, but continued to walk quickly to where we were standing.