Why Me?

Chapter 1 The Begining

Author's Note: Yeah I'm new at this, first time, and I'm actually just looking for feed back because I was hoping maybe one day I can publish this book for real. Now I have some other chapters written but I just want to see how the first one goes. Thank You and enjoy! :)

Evangeline

Cold. That's all I felt in that moment. I remember staring at the bathroom ceiling as my wrists soon became numb. I didn't do this because I was some emo chick who liked to cut; I did it because I wasn't stronger enough to live my life. All my life I had been nothing, I'd been a worthless piece of shit since the day I was born. Hold on; I'm getting ahead of my story. Let me start from the beginning, I'll tell you why I was in this situation, why I was attempting to take my own life.

*************

It was a warm August afternoon and as usual I sat in my room reading one of my many romance novels. Reading always made me feel calm and content, especially since I've been stressed out about moving.

"Evangeline, get your lazy ass downstairs so we can finish packing!" And just like that the calm atmosphere around me was disturbed. This wasn't the first time though. This has been going since I was little.

Being Evangeline Summerton wasn't the most glamorous role to play in life. I was born into a really screwed up world. You see, that woman calling me a lazy ass is my mother, Lisa. She's always been a loud, self-centered, selfish woman. I've been more of a slave rather than a daughter to her. I was an "accidental" pregnancy; so instead of aborting me, she made me her maid.

"I'm coming Lisa." I said sighing and marking my place in my book. My mother and I don't like each other very much. We've never had any type of bond. She actually told me that I screwed up her life and that she should have killed me when she had the chance. Well every time she beats me, I think she's trying to kill me.

I sat up on my bed and put my book on the nightstand. I stood up, slipped on my fuzzy slippers and made my way down stairs. As I reached the last step and turned the corner, I almost tripped over a bunch of boxes. While I tried to avoid falling onto the floor, I accidently knocked down one of my mother's "expensive" vases. It fell to the floor with a loud crash.

"Oh shit" I thought. Before I could bend down to pick up the pieces, Lisa came around the corner, her hair wild and eyes wide.

"What in the hell happened to my vase?" she said, bending down and picking up the larger of the shattered pieces. Her blonde hair was tied up in a messy bun and she wore a skin tight t-shirt with a pair of yoga shorts that were way too small for her.

"Slut." I thought to myself as she slowly stood up. If looks could kill though, I'd be dead. Her blue eyes seemed to be staring into my soul, almost trying to suck out every last bit of life I had in me.

"Do you know how much this cost me Evangeline?!" she said putting her right hand on her hip and motioning towards the remaining pieces of glass with her left.

"I don't know. Five bucks maybe?" As soon as those words left my mouth, she took her hand off of her hip and smacked me across the face. My hand flew to my face as I staggered back a little. My cheek stung horribly, causing tears to well up in my eyes.

"That should teach you not to get smart with me." Then Lisa began to leave the room, huffing and puffing. Before she turned the corner, she turned around and yelled "Now get the broom and clean up that glass before I step on it!" Then everything was quiet again.

The stinging in my cheek began to subside but my tears just kept piling up. "This is my life." I thought. It reminded me of some Cinderella story. The only differences being, I was an only child, I never knew my father and I knew all too well that I was never going to find anyone to be my Prince Charming.

As I turned around and started walking back up the stairs I thought about all the guys I've ever liked; the ones I thought could've been my prince charming. But, of course, I was rejected. There was Matthew Emerson in third grade. I sent him a little note telling him that I liked him. He turned around and told the teacher I was harassing him. Then came Jack Thayer, my crush for about six years. When I told him how I felt, he just looked at me with his hazel eyes and walked away. He still hasn't said a word to me. And lastly there was Richard Thomas my most recent heartbreak. He ended up getting into a relationship with an eighth grade floozy named Annie Thornton.

As my bedroom door grew closer, I looked at it like it was a gift from God. It was beautiful, with dark hardwood and golden hinges. I always had a knack for finding beauty in the simplest of things.

Slowly I opened the door, revealing my room. There were a few boxes piled up on top of each other next to the door and a couple more near my window. My red bookshelf in the corner had been cleared of all the books I owned and my chestnut walls had been stripped bare of all my posters of Channing Tatum and Taylor Lautner. The only object that remained untouched was my bed.

As I walked over to the bed, I sat down and just used all my senses to take in this scene, so I could remember it forever. The candle I had lit early had filled the room with the smell of fresh apple cinnamon. I kicked off my slippers and got goose bumps on my skin as my feet hit the cold hardwood. I slowly got up, taking my book from its spot on the nightstand, and walked over to my window sill. I took a seat in the rocking chair that I inherited from my grandmother and looked out the half-opened window.

Outside, the sidewalk was full of people. I looked towards the bus stop where there were five people waiting; two men, one woman and two children. One was a girl and the other a boy. As I looked at the children a smile began to form on my lips. They had to be related because the boy kept teasing the little girl about her braids. And in turn she seemed to be making fun of his neon yellow sneakers, but soon they ended up just giggling at each other; the boy hugging his sister and her returning it.

"I wish I was that happy." I whispered letting my words fly out into the wind, hoping someone would hear them. I looked down at the book in my hand. "The Lucky One" it was called. It was one of my favorite books. A man, just traveling all that way to meet a woman he had never met and they end up falling in love with one another and living happily ever after. God, I wish that would happen to me. I looked up, hugged the book to my chest and just stared out the window. I wish I could be happy, at least just once.

/// Another Author's Note: This book is under edit. If there are mistakes they will be fixed in a timely manner.///