I'll see if I can do a smut tonight. I think I'm going to make a lot more smut now. What do you guys think?
Lol Dan obsessed- I wish Phil would upload more often 《o_o》
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y/n pov
I ran a hand through my hair, feeling guilty over little things again. Do I really deserve such a life?
I bet people are working their butts off at the moment, trying to support their family so much. But my boyfriend, Joe, goes far enough to make me feel inhumane about my earnings. Not that YouTube is an easy job, nor is it hard.
I make too much money from YouTube, a lot more than I need and deserve. After I moving in with Joe, it was as of he were my father and would pay for all my expences.
I would feel the guilt now and then.
I puffed a breath of air out of my lungs, slightly frustrated. Awkwardly, yet comfortably sitting on the sofa, I look at nothing, trying to rid of the guilt.
I just couldn't.
A few tears escaped my eyes, which I quickly wiped, although not quick enough. I felt warm hands cup my cheeks and kiss a few tears away on my cheeks. My blurred vision cleared to focus on Joe.
I sighed loudly. This was the second time he had seen me cry this week.
He placed his hands on top of mine, "y/n... love please. Don't shut me out. I know there is something."
My eyes were red and puffed up, while his were in pain, suffering from denial.
It took me all my energy to make eye contact with him. Then I spoke to him of the issue.
"I don't know Joe... it's so stupid. But I have been feeling every guilty for everything I have been given. All of this, do I really deserve all this? Do I really deserve Caspar as my best friend, Zoe practically as the sister I never hand... and you. Do I really deserve to be with you?" I asked, deep in thoughts.
Joe furrowed his eyebrows, probably calling me a freak in his mind. I looked up at the ceiling, trying not to cry again. He made eye contact with me again to speak but nothing came out. We sat there for about a minute, and then he squeezed my hand, as if he was informing me that he was ready to talk. I looked up and made eye contact with him. A second later his lips were onto mine. He pecked my lips a few times.
"This is why I love you. It is impossible to meet women like you who cares about these things. Baby I know exactly how you feel. I have been there.
Months ago, I couldn't help but ask what I did to deserve a beauty such as you. I see you in a way that has never been look up by any other human being. You're so unique, I question if I am still in a dream. You're so caring for everyone you meet, and it makes me shiver with happiness when I think about our future. Oh, our future! It seems lovely, doesn't it?"
I nodded with a huge grin on my face.
"I guess I was just having some type of existential crisis." I spoke with a shaky tone.
He pecked my lips softly, reassuring that it was okay.
"You have watched too many DanIsNotOnFire videos, love."
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Babe, I know.
And I have repeated his videos 50 times as well.
(JK - I do have a life...)
