Fantasy Becomes Reality

Chapter 90

I woke up in the middle of the night and Skylar was sleeping and Andy wasn't laying beside me anymore. I knew he was having trouble sleeping all night and I tried to help him fall asleep but I eventually made myself fall asleep before him. I sat up in bed and rubbed my head and got up to go downstairs considering he wouldn't be anywhere else. When I walked downstairs he was sitting on the couch with a bottle in his hands hanging off the side of the couch as he held it.

"Andy?" I asked and he looked up at me and took a sip of the bottle that was almost empty. I went over to the couch and laid down next to him and he wrapped an arm around me.

"Why are you up?" He asked.

"Because you weren't in bed with me." I said and he shrugged and took another sip.

"Hey that's enough." I said trying to take it from him and he shook his head and pulled it away from me and ended up spilling it on himself.

"It's not enough." He said sitting up and he pulled his shirt off over his head before throwing it on the floor. I could tell if he stood up or even tried to stand up he would fall and I grabbed him before he could.

"Why?" I asked and he laid back down as he finished the bottle.

"I couldn't sleep." He said and dropped the bottle down.

"Andy." I sighed and rubbed my temples.

"Go to bed." He mumbled and I heard Skylar crying and He went to get up, I went to stop him but he stumbled forward towards the wall against the stairs and he slid his back down the wall and buried his face into his knees. He was crying and I went over to him and sat next to him and he shook his head.

"I can't even go see my baby." He said and cried and I rubbed his arm.

"Go see what's wrong." He said and I shook my head.

"Andy you and I both know the only reason she would get up at this time of night is for one thing." I said and he looked up at me.

"For me to hold her." He said and I nodded and his eyes were so red and puffy like he had been crying hours before I even went downstairs. I got up to go check on her and he still sat against the wall. He was such a drunk mess and I dont even think he knew what he was doing. I picked Skylar up out of her crib and she still continued to cry and I tried a bottle and rocking her and everything but she wouldnt stop. I brought her downstairs and Andy looked up at me as I held her as she still cried.

"My baby." He said and I sat down next to him and he picked her up and held her. He looked at her and his face lit up and he kissed her forehead. She stopped crying and he smiled weakly at her. I knew he was drunk, but I also knew he wouldn't move with her in his arms and he would be gentle with her either way. 

"I love you daddy." She said and he smiled.

"I love you too baby." He said with tears in his eyes and she played with his index finger. It broke my heart, but it also made me so happy. He was at the lowest I've seen him. He was drinking and it was usually just to have fun with me or just joke around but it was getting worse and he still showed all the love he had in him to her no matter how low he was. She still made him happy.

"So much." Andy said kissing her cheek and she grabbed his cheeks and he chuckled and grabbed hers softly. I smiled at the two of them. He looked up at me and kissed me and he tasted like complete alcohol.

"We made such a perfect baby." He said and I smiled and nodded as I pushed his hair back with my fingers.

"Yes we did." I said and he started crying again and I grabbed Skylar.

"What's wrong baby?" I asked him as I continued to run my fingers through his hair as Skylar played with my hair.

"I love you and I love Skylar so much, and I'm trying to change. I am Jasmine and I know I told you I would today but I don't know what to do anymore." He said.

"Why are you drinking?" I asked and he looked up at me.

"Honestly?" He asked and I nodded.

"My job, stress, the baby." He sighed and I closed my eyes to fight back tears and he wrapped his arm around me.

"I cried when I find out and I know I didn't keep everything completely in but I feel like it was my fault and I still do." He said and I shook my head.

"That wasn't either of our faults. You even said that Andy. We couldn't stop it from happening it just happened." I said and he didn't say anything.

"And then like moments like right now, where I couldn't even get upstairs to see Sky because of how drunk I am, I feel like I'm a horrible dad and I can barely take care of her let alone another baby and sometimes I think maybe it happened for a reason. But when I think that I feel even worse." He said I cupped his cheek and I could feel tears swelling in my eyes.

"Andy you are not a horrible dad. You're such a good dad and Skylar loves you and so do I." I said and he nodded. Skylar reached towards Andy and he picked her up and held her again.

"I'm so fucking drunk." He said and Sky wrapped her arms around the back of his neck as a type of hug and I smiled and he wrapped his arms around her.

"But I would never give this up." He said and I leaned against him and he wrapped his arm around me as he held Skylar with his other. Skylar got away from Andy and walked into the living room and we both watched her as she walked around. He looked down at me and I put my hand on his chest and he cupped my cheek. He started kissing me and leaned against me some as he kissed me, bringing me deeper into it and he slipped his tongue inside my mouth. He tasted like complete vodka and we pulled away from each other when Skylar came back in the room.

"Come on I have to get you and her back to bed." I said and he nodded. I picked Sky up and brought her upstairs and went back downstairs and helped him get up. Before we even started walking he just wrapped his arms around me and I held him.

"I'm sorry." He said and I shook my head.

"Don't be." I said muffled into his chest and I could tell he was crying.

"Hey." I said and he pulled away from me and looked down at me.

"It's going to be okay." I said and he nodded and I helped him upstairs. He fell onto the bed and pulled the covers over him and I climbed in with him.

"You better share the covers." I said.

"No." He mumbled and I pulled them off him and he chuckled and turned on his side to face me and I put some of the covers on him. He wrapped his arm around me and squeezed his eyes shut.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I'm dizzy." He said and I rubbed his back as I held them and he opened his eyes and sat up.

"I can't lay down." He said and I sat up with him.

"Here." I said and I put pillows up against the headboard.

"Lay on your back." I said and he laid down and he was pretty much half way sitting up with the pillows behind him.

"Feel better?" I asked.

"Yeah, but now I can't hold you." He said and I chuckled and wrapped my arm around him and put my leg across his waist. He rubbed my back as I held him and I kissed his chest.

"You're so fuckable." He said and I laughed.

"It's almost 4am Andy try and sleep. You're drunk." I said and he chuckled.

"Goodnight baby." He said.

"Night." I said and nuzzled my head up into his neck more. I didn't know what to do. I knew he needed me the most right now but with him being drunk I didn't know how to. He was a mess and half the things I would say to him he wouldn't even remember.