Cursed - Adopted By Yogscast

The Artist's Lament

The store was empty, as usual. Of course, by common sense, one would attribute that to the fact that the store was closed, but even when it wasn't, the shop was - more often than not - empty. I stood there, for just a moment, and breathed. I thought that maybe, if I stood still for long enough, I could go back to that day. If only life worked that way.

"Akiko, come here." Grandma smiled at me from behind a pile of kimonos. Jay was busy marvelling at Grandma's skills, she looked so excited. I quickly walked over to Grandma, who was busy pulling out a few different designs for us to see. "Don't be shy, tell me if you take a particular fancy to any of them."

"Thank you!" Jay sounded like an excited child. She chose a yellow and blue one, patterned with flowers. And I, on the other hand, couldn't decide. There were just so many. Grandma looked me up and down, and mumbled something to herself. She headed to the storage shelf, and pulled out a bright red kimono. It was covered in flowers, beautiful, beautiful blossoms that stretched from the sleeves. She smiled as she dusted it off, and handed it to me.

"Here, try this." She chuckled. "It belonged to your mother when she was your age."

She had said this so casually, but her words were heavy. The weight they carried spread from the way she said it, the words she said, the way she handed me the garment, such a bright, bloody red. I wonder what she was thinking.

Mother died, her memory a shade of red so bright it hurt me. And yet, here I stand, a living girl who should've been dead. The blood that runs through my veins are red, the blood that spilled was also red and here I stand, receiving this bloody red kimono. There I was, holding mother's memories.

Love is a red jumper, a red kimono, a carpet stained red. It all starts with red. Will it end red?

"I still have the obi somewhere!" Grandma called, opening another cabinet. Jay joined me, looking blank. She seemed confused as to why I stood like my feet were glued to the ground.

"It was my mom's."

"Oh."

Grandma smiled as she came back with a green obi belt.

"Here we go. Both of you have matching belts." She chuckled, and pushed us towards the dressing room. "Come on, let's go put them on."

***

I feel like I should pause to explain how kimono works. What Jay and I were wearing were furisode, which are typically worn by single, unmarried women. Also worn by minors. They're not the same as yukata, which are kinda like summer kimonos, they're thinner and actually so much nicer to wear. But for the sake of simplicity, I'm just gonna call them Kimonos.

Except, well, they all fit like corsets. Look, I've been through this as a child, I don't know how I managed to have fun and play games. Thank god it's still spring, or I'd burn in all of these layers. Jay got hers on first, and she was spinning happily in it.

"How are you still smiling in that?" I was bewildered, and she grinned as she faced me.

"Oh, I don't know. I just love the idea of matching with you. Green and red are complementary colours on the wheel, you know."

"Oh shut up, you."

"We can be the Primary Colours couple! See, yellow, blue, green, red." She pointed to all of the colours, grinning cheekily at me. I nudged her with a giggle, because she was so silly. I smiled at Grandma, who was readying my kimono.

"Akiko, let's go put yours on." She smiled at me, gesturing to the dressing room. I nodded and followed her, but none of me was ready. For what, exactly, I wasn't sure. I had stared Death in the face and then bid them farewell - I don't really know what I feared.

Grandmother's hands were swift and skilled, from the years of experience and practice she had accumulated.

She lost three people that night. They weren't just names that add to a news report, they're real people. They were a mother, a father, a brother, a son, a daughter, someone's friend, someone's classmate, someone's grandchild. When someone dies, they aren't just the things that we had known them as. They are always so much more.

She had not needed her skills to help her family for years. But today, her grandaughter is home. The only one left, the one who lived, is home. And because of that, she couldn't care less if her grandchild was half Swedish, or gay, or transgender, or anything else in between. The last hint she had of her child's existence, her grandaughter, is home. Akiko Sora is home.

She said that I looked exactly like my mother, as she wrapped the obi around my waist and ran a comb through my hair. She smiled at me as I looked in the mirror, seeing three people reflected back. I had to smile.

"This was the first red kimono we had ever made, you know." Grandma said, smiling at me. "Your mother loved the colour red. Even the patterns were her idea. No doubt she'd be embarrassed to see you wearing this now, because of how the kimono's design was the manifestation of a young teenager's dreams, but I'm sure she'd be happy."

"Grandma," I whispered, looking at her in the mirror. "Thank you so much for everything. I'm sorry that I didn't come back sooner."

"Don't be sorry." She replied, with the brightest smile I had seen her with all day. "You're home. That's what's important. You, despite all odds, came home. That is something to be proud of. And I am so proud of you."

-Incomplete-