Haunted

Hear You Me

"You look different," Brent stopped kissing Maddox and walked into his dressing room.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know, you just look different. Happier, maybe."

"Maybe I am. I don't feel different," Maddox looked in the mirror. He started to change out of his performance clothes and into regular clothes. "I'm starving, I probably look like I'm wasting away."

"You don't even know what starving means," Brent rolled his eyes. "You've never gone without food a day in your life."

"Shh, don't be smart," Maddox laughed. "I'm so happy you're here, seriously."

"That's good, I guess," Brent smiled. Maddox put his shoes on and stood up.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm happy I'm here too."

"Okay," Maddox could tell Brent wasn't saying everything he wanted to say but he didn't know if he should push him or not. "We're gonna go eat as soon as everyone's ready."

"Of course," Brent laughed. "I figured you'd be dying."

"We're all dying," Maddox pointed out. "Every second of every day."

"Stop, you know I hate it when you say that stuff," Brent shook his head. Maddox took his hand and kissed it.

"Sorry. I love you."

"I love you too," Brent told him. "So much, Maddox, I don't even know how to tell you how much I love you."

"I know the feeling," Maddox smiled. Brent didn't.

"That's why this is so hard for me," Brent looked down at their hands. "I feel like I'm not supposed to want anyone else, just you, and like, I really thought I could do this and just be with you for the rest of our lives but the more I think about it the more I can't stop thinking about Eli and what it would be like."

"So just go fuck Eli. It doesn't mean anything, Brent, it's just sex."

"Sex has always meant something to me. I'm not like you, Dax, I can't just go around sticking my dick in other people and not giving a fuck afterwards."

"Wow," Maddox let go of Brent's hand. "That's really what you think of me?"

"No, you know that's not what I meant," Brent protested. "Fuck, Maddox, do you see why I think this is such a bad idea?"

"I'm starting to think a lot of things are a bad idea," Maddox looked away.

"Babe, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that," Brent pulled Maddox against his chest. "I love you, I know that's not the real you."

"Except it is, Brent," Maddox pushed him away. "That's part of me too. I just love you more than I love being able to hook up with random guys."

"I've never seen it that way," Brent frowned. "I thought that was just a bad time in your life."

"I've cheated on every single guy I've ever been in a relationship with. Even Jackson, if you count him since we never officially dated because I was with someone else then too."

"Seriously?" Brent looked like he was about to cry. Someone knocked at the door.

"Dax, are you ready? We really have to get out of here," Tim called.

"Yeah, I'm ready," Maddox shouted back. "Look, let's finish this later."

"Great, okay," Brent sighed.