Demi
I stared at my phone with shaking hands.
From: 1(516) 662-5585
Hermosa. Heard the song, I'm so proud of you. I'm in New York. Can we meet up to talk? Please.
Wilmer. Fuck.
I've been sitting on the bed for twenty minutes staring at the screen, trying desperately not to cry while Nicko showered and got ready for the day.
"Hey so I was thinking we could get lunch and then just take a walk with Mia around Central Park?"
Nicko walked in wearing nothing but a towel, his voice made me jump and I ran a hand through my hair, "I have a lunch meeting actually. Last minute. But I can meet you guys at the park."
He turned around and furrowed his brow. The furrow deepened when he saw my expression, "Are you okay?"
I closed my eyes, "Yeah. Just stressing out."
The bed dipped and Nicko pulled me into his arms, kissing my hair, "Whatever it is, it's gonna be okay."
I relaxed in his arms, the decision to meet Wilmer temporarily pushed to the back as my head rested on his shoulder. "I hope so."
He rubbed my back, "Do you want to talk about it?"
I sighed and kissed his neck before sitting up, "I'll be fine. I've got to start getting ready though. It's too bad you already took a shower through... You could've joined me."
Nicko smirked and stood up, letting the towel fall from his waist, "I think I forgot to wash behind the ears."
~*~
I sat at the secluded booth in a small cafe in downtown Manhattan, waiting to confront one of my biggest nightmares.
"Hermosa."
I lifted my head and didn't smile, "Wilmer."
"Can I sit?"
I sighed, "Yes."
Wilmer sat in the chair across from me uncomfortably, "Thanks for meeting me. I just wanted to talk I guess, and apologize, for everything."
I swallowed hard, "It's not just something you forgive and forget Wilmer. I met you today to tell you to never contact me again, not to hear you out."
He lowered his head, "I checked myself into a rehab facility, and got control over my life again. I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry, I'm trying to at least tell everyone I hurt that, since I have no one now."
I could feel myself waning and quickly instructed myself not to feel bad for him. But it was hard. As much as I loved Nicko Wilmer still was a hurt part of my life before it all went bad so the feelings that rushed up to the surface weren't disgust and hatred but guilt and submission.
"Okay. You've said your piece. Is that it?"
Wilmer twisted his hands, "I guess, yes. But I want you to know that I never stopped loving you Dems. Hurting you was the biggest regret and mistake of my life. I wish I could feel the pain I cause you to take it away. I wish I could take it all back. I understand you hate me, so I won't talk to you again."
I sighed and closed my eyes, "I don't hate you Wilmer. But I haven't forgiven you, and I will never forget what you did to me. But, I don't hate you."
