Demi
I opened my eyes slowly, letting out a low groan. I blinked a few times and fully realized where I was; a hospital. I blinked again and a weight on my leg became apparent again. Looking down, I realized Nicko was slumped over the side of the bed, his arm slung over my waist with his head on my thigh. Again, I blinked, trying to clear the fog in my head.
"Nicko." My voice was a strangled whisper. "Nicko." I tried again but there was no sound coming out. Frustrated, I kicked my leg out a little and he let out a snort, then sat up, rubbing his eyes. He looked up at my face, blinked a few times, then gasped.
"You're awake!"
I winced at his loud voice, "What happened?"
His face fell, "Demi..."
"What is it?" I couldn't think straight.
"Honey you had a miscarriage."
I shook my head, "That's impossible. I wasn't pregnant."
He nodded and stroked my hair, "You were eight weeks Dems."
I leaned my head back, sliding my eyes closed, "I can't even think. My head is so foggy."
Nicko pressed a red button on the side of my bed, "It's your pain medication. They had to do surgery."
I swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat, "Do they know why I miscarried? Did I do something wrong?"
He looked down at his hands with an agonized expression, "They said it could be triggered by aggressive intercourse."
I blinked, "You mean..."
Nicko pressed his lips together, "I mean, this is all my fault."
As soon as the words left his lips he broke down, crying hard. My mouth fell open, I hadn't seen Nicko cry in forever, "Nik... Come here."
He pitifully moved his chair closer and let me pull him into a hug, "I'm so sorry." He sobbed, crying into my neck.
I kissed his hair and rubbed his back, "Stop it. Nicko please don't do this to yourself. This could've been anything. They don't know for sure if that's what caused it."
Nicko kept crying and didn't respond. I didn't know what else to do so I just held him, and cried with my cheek resting on the top of his head.
"Oh my..." I looked up as a nurse walked into the room, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to intrude."
I shook my head, "Just do what you have to do."
Nicko backed up and sat on the cot in the corner, wiping at his eyes as she took my vitals and checked my stitches. Eventually she gave me water and explained what happened during the procedure. I just stared at the wall, not really listening or caring about what she had to say.
"When can I leave?" I murmured, once she was done.
She checked her chart, "If the doctor says all is well then you can leave in a few hours."
I nodded and fell silent, which she took as her cue to leave again. I looked over at Nicko who was staring at the floor, "Nik?"
He looked up, "Yeah?"
I shifted over on the bed, "Can you come here?"
He furrowed his brow, "I think I should stay here, I don't want to pull a wire or anything."
I let my head fall back against the pillows, "I need you Nicko. Please."
Slowly, he got up and walked over, sitting next to me and carefully swinging his legs up to lay down. I curled myself into his chest, the tears leaking out again as I buried my face into his neck.
"Why did this happen?" I whispered more to myself than him.
"I'm so sorry." Nicko choked out, "I can't believe I did this. This is all my fault."
I shook my head, "Nicko you didn't do this. This is not your fault. Okay? Anything could've happened. It could've been my medications or just a complication. Please Nicko you can't fall apart. I need you to keep me together."
He just pulled me closer and kissed my hair, holding my head against his chest with one hand while the other rubbed my back. It didn't take long, because of the pain medication in my system, before I fell asleep in his arms.
~*Nicko*~
"Mr. Brooks?"
I lifted my head off of Demi's and squinted at the nurse who was standing beside the bed, "Yeah?"
She smiled softly, "I have her discharge papers."
I nodded and looked down at Demi who was still curled into my body, her mouth open a bit as she slept peacefully, "Does she have to sign them now?"
The nurse shook her head, "I'll leave them here for when she wakes up. Take as much time as you need."
I nodded, "Thank you."
She walked out, and I put my head back on Demi's rubbing my thumb across her back absentmindedly. This was going to be the ultimate test on our relationship. I didn't know how to process this, how to grieve and hold her together at the same time. I didn't know how to deal with the urges to hit things and go down a bottle of whiskey.
Demi suddenly shifted, pushing her face deeper into my chest and stretching her body out a little. I lifted my hand and put it against her cheek, watching as her eyes opened blearily.
"Hey." Her voice was rough and throaty.
"Hey." I murmured, "They dropped off your discharge papers."
She nodded and winced a bit as she sat up, "Good. I want to get out of here."
I sat up too and rubbed her back, "Are you still in pain?"
She sighed, "No, it's just sore."
I gritted my teeth, "Please do not say that."
Demi looked up at me with wide eyes, "I'm sorry Nik."
I shook my head and helped her stand up, "It's okay. You can say you're sore. I don't know where that came from."
She quickly signed the papers and leaned into me again as she put on her shoes and the sweat pants that I had grabbed last night on the way here.
"Okay, I think we're good." I put an arm around her waist and walked with her to the nurse's station where we checked out, then stood in the elevator to the ground floor. Thankfully, it was empty, so Demi wrapped her arms around my middle and sighed heavily.
"I love you."
I kissed her forehead, "I love you too."
She stroked my cheek, "Please don't think this is your fault."
I forced a smile, "I'm trying."
The doors opened and my nostrils flared as I pulled Demi behind me and glared at the man who stood there; Wilmer.
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-Rachel
