CHAPTER 4
Demi's POV
This was our third day in New York and I had been shopping like crazy and sight-seeing. I was exhausted. And today Nicko was going downtown to record some stuff for his new album and an animated movie that he is voicing a character for. I stumbled down the stairs. Today is not a good day. My voices were louder than ever. I debated asking Nicko to stay home, but that would force me to tell him about what was going on. No, I prefer to suffer in silence. Nicko came downstairs muttering sleepily. Ugh sexy. Demi stop. He doesn't like you. You're just annoying. Yeah, that's right. Fat and annoying. "Well im leavin now." He said smiling at me, "Okay i replied in a small voice. Nicko walked over and kissed my forehead, and then sauntered out of the door.
Great. All alone. Just the way the voices like it. Demi come on. Stay Strong. I forced myself to look down at my tattoos. "Stay Strong." I said aloud. "Stay Strong. Stay fucking Strong Demi." I focused on the little heart next to the word 'Strong' "Your Lovatics Demi. Stay Strong for them you've got this." Check twitter, I saw a trend with my name in it. #DemisaWhore #DemistayawayfromNicko #demisafatemo. Wow, three trends at the same time. This must be a record. I knew that me and Nicko would be found out soon and his fans would react. Tears were now pouring down my face. I scrubbed them off with the heal of my hand and went to wash my face. Opening the medicine cabinet, there sat a pack of replacements for Nicko's razor. "Do it Demi, Just once, no one has to know. Not even Nicko. Not that he cares anyway." The voices chanted in my head. "FAT FAT FAT SLUT, WHALE. CUT CUT CUT. THROW IT ALL UP. I scrambled for my phone and hit Nicko's number. The ringing felt like forever until finally he answered, "Demi?" I sobbed then hung up. Hopefully he wouldn't notice. Why did you call him Demi WHY. You're such a burden. No one wants you. "SHUT UP" I screamed outloud. I sobbed and sobbed and then my sobbing stopped as I gave in I opened the package, and took out a blade. Feeling the familiar cool medal against my skin. CRASH! The locked bathroom door was kicked open and in walked Nicko with a look of pure fear on his face. "DEMI WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" He yelled and ran over to him. "NO STOP IT" I began to scream and punch him as he reached for the razor. QUICKLY DEMI! The voices screamed. My hand went down to slash my my arm randomly. I heard Nicko's cry of pain and saw he had threw his arm in front of mine and instead of cutting my arm I had cut his. Immediately I snapped out of it. He was bleeding bad. "Oh no no no no" I started crying again as I realized what u was about to do and what I had done. "Demi it's fine." He said through gritted teeth. "It's just a scratch." "Nicko no its not let me clean it!" "No Dems it's okay I don't want you triggered." He said, Go sit in the living room and I'll be there soon. I sighed and walked into the other room, What have I just done?
Nicko's POV
I was sitting in the studio listening to the track i had just wrapped for the album. This one was definitely a keeper. Then, my phone rang. It was Demi. A smile rose to my lips as I answered it. "Hello?" A sob echoed through the phone and then the line went dead. I dropped my phone and ran out of the door. Heading to my car that I had rented I took back roads and wove through traffic on the main roads attracting alot of horns and fingers. But I don't care. Demi needed me. I burst through the front door and heard her sobbing form the bathroom. It was locked. Bracing myself, and praying she wasn't in front of the door.
I stormed in, and saw Demi on the ground screaming and my heart shattered. Then I saw the blade. "NO!" I yelled and charged towards her as she brought her arm down. I threw my arm in desperation to stop her and I felt the sting of the blade hit my arm and then the warm flow of blood. Memories swirled around me as I gasped in pain and shock. Demi was freaking out. While I was in a daze, Stuck in the past of my dark days. Remembering the cold sting of the blade as I ripped through my arms. "Nicko!" Demi screamed and I snapped out of it. I looked at my arms. A single red cut with blood dripping out of it stood there. "Let me clean it" She said. No this was definitely triggering her right now. "Demi don't worry about it go in the living room and i'll be there soon." She sighed and walked out, Still crying. I washed the cut in the sink and poured some rubbing alcohol on it. Pressing the band aid down I walked into the other room where I saw Demi sitting on the couch crying. I touched her arm and her head snapped up. Tears filled her eyes.
"Demi, What happened?" I said quietly. Her breath was ragged and short. "The voices got too loud." Her voice was nearly inaudible. "What were they saying?" She looked away. "Demi. What. Were. They. Saying." I repeated myself. "That I was fat. And ugly, and that..." She trailed off and looked away blushing. "Go on.." I lifted her chin and looked at her. Demi took a deep breath and looked me in the eyes. Her chocolate brown ones meeting my blue ones. "And that you would never love me as more than a friend." She tried looking away but I held her gaze. "Demi, I want you to know something. I am completely and utterly in love with you. I will never love anyone as much as I love you." and with that I crashed my lips against her with so much built up passion the house could have been set on fire and I wouldn't of noticed.
