Finding Me Through You

Karaoke

"Bes!" I heard what seems to be the yell of my big mouthed best friend.

"Kathryn, I know you're around here somewhere!! Come out!!" Juls continued to scream.

If I wasn't angry, I'd laugh at her.

Anyone would if they were in my position.

I'm hiding in the ocean, it's dark, and Julia is walking like she's drunk because of the wind.

I let out a laugh for which she noticed me.

"There you are!" She ran to me.

"What's up?" I replied.

"Come over here, I refuse to die of hypothermia today Kathkath." She rolled her eyes.

Now that I think about it, it's night and I'm the only one swimming. The water is freezing cold. I didn't realize the temperature and the gusty wind because my mind was occupied on other topics.

I swam back to shore.

I was shivering and my body looked blue with a hint of purple.

I don't feel so well.

"Why would you go in the water, it's like -13 degrees out there." Juls wrapped her supper comfy blanket around me.

"Thanks, Mom." I smiled but I was still shivering.

She rolled her eyes.

I took a deep breath and sat down on the sand and hugged my knees.

That's when I broke down.

I cried.

After I told myself I'll never cry for another boy again, here I am being weak, frail, and proving myself wrong all the time.

"I know it hurts. I know you're in pain. Truth is, I don't know what to tell you other than you shouldn't let this get in the way of your potential happiness. So what if they're together? Truth be told, you don't know if they are. You're assuming." She patted my back.

"He loves her." I hummed.

"And R2 admitted he loved you despite the fact that he knew she was sitting right in front of him and Sue." She reasoned.

"There are so many possible reasons and explanations, don't jump into one conclusion. I'll let you be alone and think about it. When you need me, you know where to find me Bes. I love you. You're never alone." She kissed the top of my head and she walked off.

I was thankful for Julia.

The sound of the waves crashing on the shore was almost hypnotizing me.

I was left with nothing but the cold wind, the ocean view, and a mind that could kill.

Maybe Juls is right. Maybe I'm over reacting.

Maybe he just loves her as a friend. Loves her like how R2, Diego, and Marco loves me.

But friends don't hold each other the way he holds her.

Say, maybe they do but that's because they have feelings for each other right?

Right?

Ugh! My mind is going to explode.

I should just stop thinking about this.

I should just go back over there like nothing ever happened.

Are you kidding me? I'll look like a fool. After I left with tears in my eyes, you expect me to return like nothing happened? You've completely gone nuts, Kathryn!