Finding Me Through You

Talking to the Moon

I made it to the rooftop and I stood there.

With the Quad as my view. Everyone was still there cheering and clapping.

Sue and R2 was still on stage.

While everyone was cheering, I was over here sobbing.

I closed my eyes and let my tears be the only thing I felt, the soft sobs be the only thing I hear.

The breeze was flowing through my hair.

I wish I never had feelings, that way I may spare any and every emotional breakdown. That way, I can be nothing but just a careless person in this world.

The thing is though, no matter how hard I try to numb and immune myself from potential heart breaks and depression... it continuously finds me every time.

No nook and cranny can I hide where feelings don't find me.

Sometimes I just wanna get away. To a place far away from here where no one knows my name.

I may be over reacting with all these emotion crap.

But what do you expect? I thought I finally was able to trust myself again.

I thought maybe this was one feeling I know I'm sure of.

I thought that Daniel would be the flashlight I can use to escape this dark and empty void.

I was wrong.

I was very wrong.

Now for sure I'm certain, I'll never have anything but the void I constantly try to fill. I'll never have anything but the presence of my family and friends.

That's enough for me.

Soon enough, I felt another feeling. Heavy hands on my shoulder.

"Sas."

Only one person calls me that.

I need for him not to do this anymore. I want him to forget about me so I took his hold off of me.

"My name is Kathryn." I wiped my tears.

"Why are you crying?" He looked so worried.

Please don't do this.

He looked so concerned about me..

I won't fall for his tricks anymore. I won't give him the satisfaction. I won't give in.

"I'm not crying." I spoke normally.

"That's a lie." He scoffed.

A lie?

"Funny, that word."

"What are you talking about?" He spoke confusingly.

Lies. That's all he showed towards me. Nothing but lies!

"Nothing, just leave." I wiped my tears and sat down on the bench.

I closed my eyes expecting to hear fading footsteps away from me.