I want to be real with you guys right now, I'm not in a good state of mind and I'm tired. I'm not tired, like, "YAAAWN". I'm emotionally tired, ready to give up.
I'm gonna be real, and we all know this, life is hard. Life gets really hard. And sometimes... You feel like giving up. You feel like everyone will be better off without you... That's how I feel right now. I feel done.
I remember when I was younger, maybe nine years old, I would lay in bed at night and literally try to suffocate myself with a fucking pillow. No fucking nine year old should be trying to kill themselves because nobody fucking loves them!
I'm gonna be honest, a few hours ago I was thinking about ending it all. One of my good friends tried to kill themselves this weekend and I thought "I must be useless cause I could have helped if they would have told me before they did anything." I'm going crazy! I swear to god, I'm going insane and have no idea what to do! I don't have money for therapy. Nobody believes me when I say I'm depressed and need help.
You guys can't see me, but I'm completely broken right now. I made a bed in my closet, I have food and water in here, and I'm completely dead. I should probably un-come out at school, so I can be treated like a human by some people. Get a normal crush cause I'm pretty sure my crush now hates my guts. And I'm having trouble with my sexuality again.
The only upside in life right now is that I'm making a blanket at school and I'm putting Shane Dawson's book cover for 'It Gets Worse' on it... Judge me.
Sorry about the rant guys.
Love you.
See ya.
YOU ARE READING
Guys, I'm Gay
Non-FictionThe Life Story of a meme fueled, hormone filled, raging homosexual teenager. I'm just here to share my experiences and "knowledge" or advice on life as a teenager going through shit. Sit back and relax, and look at my shitty life in the slowly bei...
