Right Now **EDITING**

Let Me Love You

Virginie's Point Of View

May 23th

"Oh my God!  Oh my God!!  Matt?  What are we going to do?" I let out on the edge of hysteria, gesticulating like crazy, walking in circles in the bathroom.

"Just...  Calm down, we'll figure something out.  We always do."  He tries to me to reassure me from the other side of the door and it takes a while for me to actually do calm down.

"You are right.  I can't believe I put us into this mess."  I finally agree and sigh deeply, regretting my actions, putting both of my hands on the edges of the sink, looking down.

"What other choice did we have?  It's dangerous being on the road, we had to find somewhere to stay."  He says as I can see him on the other side of the door.

"I'm so sorry, Matt.  Everything went a little too far." I shake my head and look at myself in the mirror above the sink.  I walk to the door and peek through the opened gap of the bathroom door.

"Hey?"  He says as I look at his hand taking mine.  "Look at me.  Everything is going to be all right.  We'll head back downstairs and get married, as long as we don't sign anything, it isn't official."

"You are right...."  I sigh of relief and calm down, once again, from looking into each other's eyes, and my thoughts make me laugh.  "What a way to take things slow."

I hear him laugh from the other side of the door.

"Now?  Are you ready to head downstairs and be my 'wife'?"  He jokes and I'm glad he takes it this way, because I'm really freaking out.  

It's ironic because he seemed tense about lying to everyone and he is the one that seems fine with us getting 'married'.  What other choice did I have but to say how a great idea it was for Pastor Dan to suggest it.  I, of course, tried my best to get around the situation, but everyone is ecstatic about it.

"No.  I can't get out.  You mustn't see me.  Tell Regina and Adeline that I need my bridesmaids.  I'll meet you at the altar."  I say and even though I try to make it seem like everything is fine, I am mortified.  It feels so real.  

I can't do this.  

My hands are getting cold and I'm shaking from everywhere, mostly my hands.  I walk to the mirror and sigh deeply.  I'm not even caring about my hair still a bit wet from the rain or my blushed cheeks.  I know I look horrible and it isn't helping at all my state of mind.  

What have I gotten ourselves into?  How real can this wedding be?  I don't know how it's supposed to go.  I chose the only dress in the bag of clothes Matt made me.  Ironically, it's the yellow dress I wore for my first date with Harry.  Everything gets me very emotional.  I just started seeing Matt for something more than my best friend and we are already getting married.  Maybe I would marry Matt in the future, but I still don't know if he is right for me.  I mean, I don't know.  I would have wanted to have him as my best friend for the rest of my life, so how does it differ as a boyfriend.  Am I allowed to call him like that?  We haven't discussed it yet.  It wasn't a struggle when I was with Harry, because he introduced me to his mother that way and I was incredibly glad.  

Everything gets me very emotional.  I keep myself from crying because I hear the women climbing up the stairs and entering the room.  I don't know if Matt is still in the bedroom, but I regret not letting him see me.  I would have maybe felt better.  What I know for sure right now is how badly I just want to be in his arms as he tells me everything is going to be fine, but this whole situation is so messed up.  I regret all the lies I've told.  I want to do the right thing and I don't know how to fix this.