Watcher (KSImon)

Eighteen

I woke up, jumping into an unfamiliar room. Then I remembered where I was. Slowly tiptoeing down the hallway, trying to leave before they caught be, Em entered. She cocked her head, seeing me stuffing my wallet into my pocket.

"Simon! Don't leave!" Em exclaimed. Ethan appeared wearing a funny bathrobe.

"I need to get back to Uni," I groaned.

"You HATE Uni!" Em complained, leaning on Ethan's shoulder.

I shrug, thinking about how much I'd hate to leave, "but I have to go!"

"No you don't," Ethan insisted, "we have few of the boys coming over at noon to film a video- you remember I told you about YouTube right?"

"Yeah," I had seen a couple of videos of his, but I only watched JJ's channel constantly.

'We're doing a crossbar challenge," he smirked.

"Ok, ok. You sold me," I sighed. What mess had I gotten myself into exactly?

~~~

Ethan and I hung out together, catching up on the things we didn't already.

"So... How's JJ," I brought up nervously, hoping he wouldn't suspect anything. Instead, he giggled an Ethan laugh, like usual.

"Of course you ask that," he chuckled a bit more, "he's great! I mean, all of us have YouTube channels now. It's become a real group effort. Literally. We have a thing called the Sidemen. Everyone's in it, except you."

"I tried YouTube," I said gloomily, knowing my efforts weren't as amazing as theirs.

"Really? How was it?" Ethan said excitedly.

"Eh. A thousand subscribers?" I shrug sheepishly.

He gasped, "that's isn't that bad! I bet I could help you out, what type of games do you do?"

"FIFA and GTA gameplay, but I don't use my face, only my voice."

"Ok, that's a start," Ethan dragged me along, into his room. There he had a large setup, my eyes took it all in. This must be what professional YouTubers' setups look like. His camera was on a tripod, along with a microphone under it.

"Oh woah," I had no words, "my setup is a gameplay recorder and a microphone," I joked.

"You want to make a video?" He asked.

"What?"

"Do you want to make a video?"

"Sure," I blurt. He sits me down in a chair and starts to prep the microphone.

"We're going to introduce you to your fans. I'm guessing you have not done this, since you don't show your face. Now you will."

"Um.. ok?" I slide with whatever Ethan was doing. He flicked on his camera, and gave me a look to begin.

"Hi again.... it's me," I say out of nowhere. Ethan cracks up laughing, "this is the first time I've ever done a video.. with my face, and guess who I have here! Behzinga!" I'm pretty sure he told me that. No suspicion in his eyes.

"Hello!" He waved at the camera, "so, I'm going to be asking Simon some questions, so you can get to know him better! Number one. Favorite breakfast food."

"Eggs."

"Well that's going to change very soon if you stick around with us! Question two. Favorite football position?"

"Easy," I scoffed, "striker."

"Thought so. Question three! First girlfriend," he smirked.

I paused, "never had one..." and then whispered, "never will.." my words escaped me before I could speak.

"What?" Ethan looked at me oddly.

"I'm..." what it time yet? I stared at the camera, wishing it wasn't on. Ethan saw my look of distaste, and flipped it off for a second.

"Are you ok, Si?" 

I shook my head rapidly, "I can't... I don't... I've never told a single soul, Ethan," my heartbeat started to speed up. He saw how pale I was getting and grabbed my hand.

"Is it happening again? It's okay, Simon,"

I knew Ethan. He was my kindest friend. It was time. I couldn't hide forever.

"I'm gay."

OK. 

I just need to say this one thing. Ethan Payne may just be the most kind and honest YouTuber, maybe even person, I've ever seen. If you don't know what I mean, you'd better watch this Behz video, if you care.

You just need to be yourself. Don't change for others.

Ok no more of this soppy stuff from me see ya.

(Also, I'm in school now, so I won't have as much time to write. I'll try a chapter a day.)

-Emma xx