xvi : castigate
❝to criticize (someone) harshly❞
[Day 17.5]
I walk into Aurora Cafe and it doesn't provide me the warm welcome it usually gives me. It doesn't give the sense of safety it used to give me. It doesn't give me the feeling of home anymore... I'm numb all over, it's freezing though the heat is turned up to the fullest. I look around the cafe, noticing new things about it, like the new coffee equipment, the new vintage garden set at the corner, and the old looking second hand sofa that makes creaking sounds when someone sits on it. I also see Matt. Sitting in a dark corner, a cup of milk tea in his hands, a permanent scowl gracing his features.
I stride carefully towards the table and sit down across from him. Matt looks up, a cold, cold smile on his lips and I shiver. No wonder the place is cold, it's him. With his heart of stone. He wasn't always like this, he had once had a heart that filled with warmth provided by the sun, the cheerfullness of a five year old, and the smile that could light up the world. But that's gone now, things like that never last.
"You came." He greets shortly.
I give him a curt nod before reciting my order of tea to the waitress standing by.
I don't take my coat off, still shivering from the atmosphere of the once homey cafe.
"Tell me what you need." I say, acting as if nothing's wrong, acting as if I don't know what this is all about, acting as if I'm not terrified senseless.
"Oh, but have a drink of tea, first, my dear." He says portraying the image of a perverted fifty year old man creeping on teenage girl's facebooks and stalking them.
My tea arrives and I let it warm my hands before I take my sip, "Still the same taste, I see." He says, referring to the cup of Earl Grey in my hands.
I nod, "Go on, Matthew." I say.
Instead of cringing at the mention of his full name, he grins and leans forward.
"Relax, Julianne, no nead to be so eager." He says.
"Don't play games with me, tell me what you need." I say, wanting to get this over with.
"Nothing... I just wonder why you come back here, when I clearly warned you to stay away." He says.
I sit stiffly in my seat, at the very edge, my head spinning, fear gripping my insides like second skin.
"Oh sweetie, soften up, don't get yourself frustrated just yet, I haven't even started yet." He says and I can't breath.
Maybe I did the right decision of avoiding you like the plague. Seven days of not trying to earn everyone's forgiveness, what a waste of time, but such an important thing to do. To protect once again.
He grabs my hand from across the table and smiles, "Oh don't be like this, I'm not going to bother you, really, I'm just going to remind you of things... Things you must have forgotten through the years..." He says and I'm too afraid to take my hand back, afraid of the consequences not playing along will provide.
My throat tightens, "What do you mean?" What do you mean? I thought I was done? I thought...
"Oh, dear, I will never leave you alone, haven't we established this already? Happy endings are impossible nowadays, don't you agree?" He says.
"I haven't gained forgiveness, have I?" I say, careful with my words.
"Ah, but soon. I'm just reminding you of the distance you must keep, to keep those you love." He says before letting go of my hand.
I swallow, "Yes, I understand." I say, and it's all coming back now.
"Stay away and everything will be alright. Take your mum away, my dear. Take her away from them, and everything will go accordingly." He says.
I close my eyes, this can't be happening. Not.. Not again.
I feel numb. All over, and everywhere. I feel like I'm going to throw up. This has to be a dream... This has to be some sort of dream... This has to be... My imagination... A flashback.
"Sorry, but not sorry to spoil your visit, sweetheart, but it has to be done, doesn't it?" He says before grinning.
I don't reply.
"Sip your tea, it's getting cold." He says.
I nod, gripping the mugs handle and swallowing the rest of the luke warm tea.
"Is that all?" I ask stiffly.
He smiles, "Yes, love, that is all. You can go now... Just remember my words." He says before leading me out of the cafe.
"Take heed, my dear, take heed." He says before walking in the opposite direction.
I sit down on the bench outside the cafe, I don't know how long I sat there with thoughts of regret flooding my mind, but I knew it was long, because when I snapped out of it, the sun was going down, and so was what was left of my hope.
{before the beginning of trouble}
"I like you." I look up and I don't know how to respond.
"W-What?" I ask, not sure if I heard right.
"You heard me, I like you, Julianne. Way before he did." He says a sense of bitterness in his voice.
"Matthew..." I say.
"No. You belong with me, not him. Get away from him before you get hurt, before he hurts you... Before his fame starts affecting you." He says and this is not Matt.
My Matt, my best friend, is gone. This is not him. This is not him.
❝love changes everyone, sometimes for the good, and sometimes for the bad. in love you will surely get hurt, it just depends if your wounds heal and you become stronger or if they don't heal and your left weaker than you were before. love changes you, love changes everything you once knew.❞
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50 Days Of Grey (#Wattys2015)
FanficThere are instances in your life when loving someone greatly isn't enough. When letting go becomes a must not because that particular someone isn't good for you but because you aren't good for him. Julianne feels utterly and completely conflicted. I...
