I'll remember him 2

Better person

*Celine's POV*

I open my eyes and slowly wake up in my creme colored bedroom. I open the curtains to let the sun light up the room and put my skinny jeans on with a blouse on top. I brush my teeth and comb my hair like on any other day, any other day without Niall. It's been three days now since I saw him and that feels so unnatural. Waking up next to him is like waking up in heaven. His worm torso pressed against my body, my arm wrapped around his tights. His blue eyes looking down at me full of love. It's sad really that I will never be able to feel that again and just have to live with the memory and pain of guilt. Because all of this is my fault. I couldn't stop Harry that night. The worst thing is that I didn't even want to stop him.

My feet carry me downstairs where my mother is baking eggs in the kitchen. Today is the big day. Today they're going to take my baby away from me. I always have been against abortion, the thought of mothers killing their own baby's made me sick but now.. I'm just like them. Now I understand them, their insecurity. I have no choice have I? I'm not able to raise my baby alone and receive no help from anybody except my one best friend Kate. Because Astrid wont be able to look at the baby and Niall wants the baby rater dead than alive. Harry wouldn't physically help me, he would give money or something. Liam will chose the side of his brother so only Kate is left. When the others don't make her not seeing me again at least.

What a thought, like they could stop Kate from helping me. Kate would do anything to be there for me.

"Do you want me to join you?" My mother asks. I shake my head.

"No I think I better do this alone."

That is obvious the biggest lie I've ever told in my life.

"Okay sweetheart." She says and turns back to her eggs. She swings a red towel over her shoulder before placing the pan on the table. I take three plates out of the cabinets and sit down on my regular seat.

"Thanks." I say when my mother puts the eggs on my plate. She smiles and strikes my hair before sitting down as well.

She grabs my hand and looks at the ceiling.

What is she..

"Dear lord,"

O my god you have to be kidd..

"Thanks for this new day full of new chances..."

Oh god.

"Give Celine the strength to go to the hospital and support her by her brave decision."

Mom please sto..

"Give her the power to step back into life like she did before." She interrupts my thoughts again.

"Give her her bright smile back that I had to miss for all these weeks and please lord let her be the loving and charming Celine again."

Mom this is absolutely..

"Amen."

Woooh finally.

This is obvious one of the things I did NOT miss about home. Really.

"I better get going if I don't want to be late at the hospital."

"I'll take you." She says while standing up from her seat.

"No mom I want to go by bike."

"Are you sure.?"

"Yes."

No.

I kiss her cheek before grabbing the keys of my bike and head to the garage. I take the steering wheel into my hands and lead it to the driveway.