a little collection

14

he stares at me, tears streaming down his face.

"please....i can't just let you go. you've made such an impact on my life, i can't let you walk out like this." he sobs, and i hate seeing him so crushed. i didn't want to hurt him like this, and i don't want to let him go.

"i'm sorry, i feel like......i feel that i'm not a top priority in your life. like you're still in love with her and-"

"why do you keep stressing this? she is not a top priority anymore. when we kissed, when we had to pose for the photography project, i felt something. i felt lifted. of course, being me, i ignored it. but then you opened my eyes. i love you and you only.

"this is insane. don't you understand? we both know what we want. let's be in love together." he nearly shouts.

"we can't keep sneaking around like this, okay? there's too much risk, and i want to be able to love someone without hiding it in public."

i grow silent as he cries more, and i don't want to hurt him. he notices my silence, and he suddenly grows angry. he quickly rushes over to me, grabbing me by the shoulders.

"jesus christ, please just say something! i'm tired of you having these strange days of silence, it kills me every time you do! i love your voice, i love everything that comes with it! just please, i beg of you, say something!" he shakes my shoulders hard, and i make eye contact with him.

my lips quiver, and i want to say something. like word vomit, it all spills out.

"it hurts me, whenever i try to stop loving you when you love someone else. it physically hurts me, and i want to hold your hand again. i want to be able to say that you're my one true love. but i want you to be happy, and if being with someone else will do that, then i won't force you to love me the way i do you. but i don't want to lose you. not again. it's bad enough that i can't have you right now. but i want nothing more than for you to hold me." my shoulders visibly relax as the words flow out, and my eyes fill with tears.

he sits in front of me in shock at what i said. he searches my eyes, and they're pooling with tears, and he flings himself onto me, wrapping his arms around my waist. i sob into his hair, curling my fingers in it.

"you can never lose me, i'll never let you go. you're the only one i truly love, i promise, okay? don't forget that. my heart is yours and vice versa. i love you." he consoles, his hands rubbing my back.

"i love you. don't let me go, okay?" i ask, my voice rough from sobbing.

"never." i look at him, and he looks back. i take his face in my hands and pull him towards me, locking our lips together. he kisses me back, placing his hands at my neck.

i run my hands through his hair, along his neck, and he groans, pleasured by the touch. his lips travel down to my neck, his hands now at my hips, and he softly bites on the flesh, and damnit, it feels amazing. i bury my face in his hair, and he kisses along my collarbone, and i deeply inhale, tilting my head back.

i quickly stop him, and he looks up at me, his blue eyes sparkling.

"i promise that i won't let you go." he whispers, and we hold each other, feeling safe.