Taming Sawyer (editing)

Chapter 29

Peyton's POV
"Why would your dad come back? Is he even allowed to see you?" My concern for his safety was coming out even though this wasn't what I called him for. I couldn't help myself but care for him.

"No, but that didn't stop him. I'm too afraid to tell Anna. I know she'll go berserk and try to go find him. It's no use. He didn't hurt me, just told me the truth. Told me that even though I was given this great life here, I was still the white trash I was born as. Moving in with Anna wasn't going to change that. I'm his son, I was soon going to follow in his sloppy footsteps and I did. I was going to mess everything good I had going for me, and I did. I lost you, and I'm going to lose Anna too. He wants me back," he pours his heart out again, making mine ache for him. The phone was silent on both ends for a few seconds. Neither of us knowing what to say. "I still love you, Peyton,"

The tears streamed down my face. The tears I thought I already let out. I thought I was dry from all the tears I had let fall because of him. Yet here I am, crying again. "You really hurt me. I'm still hurting. I thought we were okay. I thought we were more than okay. It wasn't until the night you cheated on me, that I really analyzed it all. Maybe we got too much into the physical aspect of the relationship, we didn't let the emotional part develop along with it,"

"I was not just physicality attracted to you," the anger was now coming from him. Just thinking of him getting angry at me when he's the one who messed up made me boil. "I fucking love you. I love your soul and mind. Your body is just what carries all that I love. I used to only think of how hot the girl was until I met you. You made me realize there's much more beneath the surface. You have a story just like me. We all have a story. And I'm the most luckiest guy in the world to get to share with you and you share with me. I know there's no chance of me ever getting you back. But I will always, forever, love you. I will never stop,"

"I don't know what to do from here," I was honestly confused on what I needed to do or say. I never thought of this happening. I knew I wanted to know what happened , yet I'm still not totally for sure what did. Maybe he's saving me the details for my sake.

"I would like to be friends. I know we can't be what we were for the stupid shit I did. And this is selfish of me to say, but I need you in my life. I can't have you the way I want you. Friendship is the next best thing in this," his voice was dry, probably from crying.

"I don't think I can do that,"

"You don't have t-"

"But I want to."

"Really? I-"

"I gotta go. I'll talk to you later,"

I couldn't stay on the phone any longer. I didn't know where the conversation would go. Better to end it then to get to the point where we both didn't know what to do. I knew it was going to be awkward between us. It's a good thing we have two different friend groups, keeping us apart as much as possible. I would see him occasionally when school started back. I could deal with that. It'll still hurt, but now things are at a level ground. I don't know all the details, but I know enough to go on with my life. Knowing more wouldn't hurt, but that can come later on. Maybe after a little more time apart.

Over the course of our break up Christmas passed. I bought Sawyer's Christmas gift a few days before our break up. I got him something simple that he could wear everyday. I got him a black under armor hoodie. When I got the call that night, my mom immediately took it back the next morning. Knowing I wouldn't be able to do so myself. I even spent Christmas morning in my room, until Vikki made my parents bring Christmas to my room. Sweet gesture, just wasn't in the jolly mood to begin with.

The new year was this weekend and everyone had a plan of going to Ricky's. Everyone was invited. Even Sawyer's group of troublemaker friends. I was hesitant at first if I should go since it would be to hard to be around him. But that was before we worked it out.