My Lighthouse

Breakfast time

When Mark finally woke up, Sheila was already out of bed. He stretched himself and felt the muscles hurt in his whole body. Mark smiled, it was not just because of the fabulous sex he had with Sheila, but the performances were more intensive as he had thought. He was glad he had a day off today and massaged his temples. He put his hands under his head and stared at the ceiling. He noticed, he couldn't get his smile of his face and this was all thanks to Sheila. She had brought love, trust, fun and the best way of making love into his life. He had asked her to marry him, but he had never thought of it, how they were going to take care of that. After the tour, that was one thing for sure. This meant next year at the earliest. Mark frowned, Hmm I don't like that idea at all actually, he said to himself. He remembered the look on her face, when he showed her the diamond ring, he bought her. He would never forget her beautiful shining eyes and the way she responded. Where was she anyway? He thought she went to the toilet and would be back in a minute, but her side of the bed stayed empty.

Mark got out of bed, put on his jogging trousers and went downstairs. The double doors towards the garden were open. The sun was shining into the living room and the smell of spring floated into the house. Mark didn't saw her at first, until he noticed her naked legs on the garden chair. She sat with her back towards the house and her legs pulled onto the chair. With her arms around her knees she was holding a mug of coffee between her hands. Her face lay on her knees, staring into the garden. Sheila was only wearing one of his oversized shirts and Mark loved the way she looked in it.

A nickel for your thoughts, he asked softly. Sheila was slightly shocked, because she didn't heard him coming. She looked aside, her eyes shining in her special way, as only she could look at him. Mark felt his heart missing a beat. Sometimes her eyes showed him her soul, which was full of love for him. But he also saw her doubts and her pain, which hadn't been all gone overnight. Mark ran with his hands through her hair and bended over to gently kiss her lips. Hi beautiful, he whispered with his lips against hers. She took one hand of her mug and caressed his face. A warm hand because of the coffee, but it were her eyes who warmed him. Hi sweetheart, she whispered back. Sleep well? Mark smiled, pulled another chair close and sat down. Yes, I slept well, but it was so cold when I woke up. Sheila grinned and leaned with her head against the back of her chair, while looking at him. You have to get used to that, the next couple of months. Mark shortly closed his eyes and took a deep breath. I don't know if I want to get used to that. Sheila frowned. What do you mean? To be alone for such a long time, you know I am not good at that. Meaning? Sheila was still tired and not really in the mood for riddles. I want you with me, he said out of blue. But Mark, Louis said....Mark took her hand, while his arm leaned on the arms of the chair. No! I don't give a damn about what Louis said. I have to perform there. When I don't feel well, I can't give my full 200%. Sheila kept holding his hand, while she closed her eyes and hold her face up towards the sun. I am tired fighting with Louis, Mark. If you want to see me, or I want to see you, I can fly over, can't I? That's not the same and you know it, Mark answered slightly irritated. Sheila stood up from her chair, please Mark, I am not in the mood for discussions like this right now. Coffee?

Sheila stood in the kitchen, making coffee as she felt the tears running down her face. She didn't wanted to cry, but she just couldn't hide them anymore. She felt so confused, about how to feel and what to do next, now Louis took her job away from her. She realized, that because of this, he also took a part of Mark away from her. Her job had been her life for so long. Her way to feel good about herself and her way to take care of Mark and of course Nicky, Shane and Kian. For eight years it had been more than just a job. It was her life, her family. Because of Mark asking her to marry him, he wanted to give her a family, but instead she lost one too.

She heard the kitchen door open and even without turning around, she knew Mark stood very close by. What's wrong? He asked worried. She could feel his breath against her skin and it gave her the shivers. I don't want to talk about it today okay? It's your day off . We should have a lovely day in the sun. Mark moaned and put his arms around her to pull her close. With his face against hers, he said soft but firmly, That's a lame excuse babe. Especially today, you need to talk to me, when something is wrong. Are you having second thoughts? He hoped she would deny that. No of course not, what kind of a question is that? Mark's face was so close to hers, he could feel her wet skin against his. Suddenly he realized she was crying. He turned her around and looked into her tearful face. Oh sweetheart.....Mark took her face between his hands and with his thumbs he wiped away her tears. Sheila looked at him with panic in her eyes and fell in his arms crying. Mark was overwhelmed by her reaction and the only thing he could do right now, was hold her close and comfort her.