The Knock (Destiel)

Chapter twenty-six

26. Happiness does exist after all

*mature content*

       "I'm sorry for overreacting," Castiel mumbled, his head resting on Dean's chest. The hunter didn't react for a while, silently letting Castiel know that it was alright.

       "I'm sorry for not listening to you," he eventually replied. This made Castiel look up in confusion. Dean noticed this and started to explain. "You said you were worried that something bad was going to happen, but I just kept following my horrible gut feeling. If I had listened to you, this wouldn't have happened."

       After visiting Lucifer, they had heard that the eldest Novak could leave in approximately a week. Everyone was happy, and Gabriel had immediately offered him to stay at his place. Soon after that announcement, the Winchesters and Castiel were on their way home again. This time, it wasn't an awkward car ride.

       Now, Castiel and Dean were attempting to watch a movie in Dean's room, but decided to just cuddle and talk. Even though it must have been a week tops, it felt like they had apart way longer. Bobby and Sam were off to Jody Mills for a few days, giving the couple some time alone.

       "Don't be," Castiel said, laying his head down again. He breathed in deeply, smelling Dean's familiar cologne. He intertwined his hand with Dean's, smiling lazily. All of a sudden, he felt Dean tense up.

       "Cas, please tell me I'm overreacting," Dean spoke, his tone wary. At first, Castiel didn't notice and hummed questioningly. However, when Dean pulled up his sleeve, he suddenly understood his concern and pulled his arm away quickly.

       For a second, he wondered how Dean could notice the scars next to all the others Crowley had created. They were made only hours apart. When he shot a quick look at his wrist, he realised the slight difference. Strangers would probably not see the difference, but Dean could. Next to the by Crowley created sloppy cuts, his own looked too precise and thought about. Parallel, horizontal lines covered his wrist, while Crowley had sliced wherever was possible.

       Feeling self conscious and guilty, Castiel tried to distance himself from Dean. It didn't really work out, as Dean had a strong grip on him. The injured man whimpered slightly, afraid of what the hunter would say.

       "Please, be honest with me," Dean tried again. Although Castiel didn't detect any sign of anger, it was clear that Dean was emotional by the way his voice cracked.

       "I thought I had lost the only thing to live for. I just wanted the heartbreak to stop," Castiel replied quietly. He was afraid to look up, but did when he felt something wet on his shoulder. Was Dean crying?

       "I'm so stupid," Dean choked out, while another tear escaped his eye. Castiel left his current position and basically sat on top of the emotional man, straddling his lap. He pulled Dean up, so that their chests were almost touching. Reaching out to his face, Castiel wiped away the tear streaks on both Dean's cheeks.

       "Why would you say that?" he asked, tilting his head slightly. His hands never left the hunter's slightly unshaved cheeks. The position they were in was intimate, as it felt like they were staring in each others souls.

       "I should have just listened to you. If I had never gone into that security control room, nothing would've happened. You would still be happy with me," Dean spoke, as vulnerable as ever. Instead of responding, Castiel closed the distance between them and pressed a lingering kiss on his lips.