The boy who broke me

17.

The holiday was filled with tanning in the blazing sun and a endless blue sky, I was happy and surrounded by the people I love. But then it's the last 3 months of school and they pass by in a blur of chaos and hell.

The more I studied, the less control it felt like I had.
Gabriel and his gang decided that since I had a mouth of my own, they'd beat Loki into a endless supply of blue eyes and one time, a badly broken nose.

Ryan, well he hasn't come back to school. He's doing his classes via his laptop and Addy has taken a beating of the different kind.
Because of me, because of that one sentence. They are suffering, Loki gets punched at least once a week, so badly that some days he can't walk. I hate myself for what I did to him.

Addy never speaks anymore, she helps Ryan after school and during it she sits with me, but she never says a word.

Hannah's made sure that she's as much of a well known freak as what I am, that she can't go to hockey after school without obtaining some sort of injury or nasty comment. She's lost her spark, it died the moment Hannah got her brothers to hate her, to believe that she was the reason they weren't being accepted into the crowd of their choice.

The people I love, the people who cared for me have been forced to hide because of the pain.

My comments have gotten worse, they drop fat camp pamphlets in my locker and I get regular calls from the gym or weight loss companies saying that they have a application for me. And that it's been suggested that I desperately need the help.

And so we all studied, we studied for math, English, biology and all the most boring subjects you could think of because what else could we do ?

Loki can't come over anymore, his sister hates that he's hurt and that she doesn't know why. So she just keeps him at home and when he manages to visit I just cry.

Addy and Ryan study together, she can't look at me. She's not mad, she says it's just that she can't handle with so much hurt and still pass our last year of school. I understand what she wants, I'll give her space. She helps Ryan so much, that you can easily see what her distraction is.

Jenn and Ryan are on good terms again, they speak and sometimes she comes over for ice tea. It's the only good this that's happened to any of us these past few weeks.

Today I write my last exam, graduation is in 2 days and after that we're free for a month until we start at university. Loki and I got into two universities that are a half a hour drive apart and our apartments are 10 minutes apart so if we manage to make it through this rough patch, distance won't be a problem.

Addy can't study, she's continuing her parents family business. They own a hotel. Large and a huge money magnet, her future is bright. She and Caden have a good relationship growing. They've been on several dates, kissed and he asked her to be his girlfriend  a week ago according to Ryan. I'm glad that she has someone to help her.

Once school is over, I plan on leaving. College is a 4 hour flight away from home. It's enough distance. I don't have any other kids following my pursuit except Ryan and Jenn. Since we all applied at the same time we all got into the same school.

Loki will be close, Addys hotel won't be far away and Caden will help Addy until he finds his feet or a school.
Once we get out of this hell hole, I'll be able to breathe. We all will.
•••
Graduation went as well as it possibly could have, mom cried over the fact that her 'babies' were all grown up, that there was a empty seat next to her where dad should have been and Ryan and I both passed our last year of school with a grade we're both proud of.

Present day
"It's been 3 days into our holiday and neither of us know what we want to do." Ryan complains in my ear as we lie on the couch, watching my cartoons.
"Lets go somewhere then." I say.
I've always wanted to travel, to see a ocean so clear that I could see the fish beneath its surface. To see towns so old that the buildings are faded and crumbling. To meet people with foreign accents and exotic clothing that I've never seen before.
"Great. But where ? It's not like we have the money."
"That's where you're wrong, I've been working for over five months now and I haven't spent a cent since our eighth birthday."
"I've got something saved too." He says.
"So we have enough." I say, growing more eager by the second.
"How about we go to Spain ?" He suggests.

I start to answer him when there's a knock on the door, I frown. I wasn't expecting anyone since Ryans the only person who's speaking to me right now. Ryan gets up to answer the door since I'm glued to my seat, too afraid to face whoever is at the door.

"She's hurting. We all were, but you left. Maybe you should just turn around, Bro." I hear Ryan say and I just can't take it.
I run to the door, all the tears I refused to shed rolling down my cheeks. It's Loki, he's finally standing at my door just like in my dreams every night.
Before I get there I hear  him tell Ryan that he loves me and that he had to leave for a while in order to figure out what to do.
What does he mean.

When I reach the door, his back is faced to me and his shoulders are shaking. As if he too were crying.
"Wait." I scream.
He stops in his tracks but doesn't turn around. I run up to him, when I'm facing him he engulfs me and puts his head in my neck. His face is wet, he  was crying as well.

"I'm so so sorry." I whisper.
"You have nothing to be sorry for."
"Because of me, you were hurt. And so was Addy."

"Listen to me." He says taking my shoulders and forces me to look at him.
He takes the back of his hand and wipes my tears.
"None of that was your fault. Nothing that happened was something you could have stopped. I figured some things out while I was gone and now I'm here to help you."

"You left. Everyone left." I whisper.
"I know, I know baby and I'm so sorry." He says and hugs me tightly.
I nod against his chest.
"I love you my angel and I always will." He says.
"I love you too." I say, wiping my tears away.
•••
Loki spent the night in the spare room since my mom was working the night shift.
Addy is coming to spend time with Ryan, never me these days but I'm going to make it right. I have to.
•••
Addy comes in and she's a mess. Her eyes are blood shot and her clothes are filthy. Her hair and her face look as if someone's scratched and pulled at her.
She's crying.
"I... i. I just can't." She sobs.
"I know, Ad. I know." I say and pull her into a hug.
"They. Punched. Caden." She's a mess, she cries so hard that she's shaking.
"Your brothers ?"
"And Gabriel."
"I'm so sorry, where is he ?" I ask, becoming worried myself.
She cries again. Even harder than before.
"In the hospital. I just got off the phone with his sister." Loki says.
And suddenly I don't know what to do.

Beside me, Addy crumples to the ground. She's shaking as she cries into her knees.
I go numb, unaware of everything that's going on around me.
Loki bumps me, shakes me by the shoulders and eventually I come out of it.
He bends down and picks Addy up off the floor, walking over to the couch and placing a blanket on top of her. She places the head on the pillow, tears still roll down her cheeks endlessly. There's a loud thumping coming down the stairs. Ryan.

"What the hell happened ?" He asks, crouching down in his haunches so he is on eye level with Addy.
When no one answers him, he takes to holding her hand.
"Everything's going to be just fine, Ad."
She nods and I try my best to believe him.
________________________________
CHARACTER LIST.

Loki Scott - Cole Sprouse
Tyla Scott - Madelaine Petsch
Rylin Dresden - lily Collins
Ryan Dresden - Colton Haynes
Mrs Dresden -  Jennifer Aniston
Adeline Marks - Lili Reinhart
Grayson Marks - Cody Christian
Jason Marks - Dylan o'Brien
Caden Halley - Austin Butler
Jenn Road - Phoebe Tonkin