Tokyo Deception

36

"Well, that was touching. There are a few things I want to know Mimi." Shigure said in a cold tone with a face as hard as stone.

She could tell Shigure was annoyed and had a bone to pick with her. Mimi waited for Shigure to turn and walk towards the living room then she followed.

"If you are truly over him like you say you are then why the hell did you not want to tell him about us?" Shigure said as soon as Mimi stepped into the living room.

It was the same thing they had talked about when she had woken up this morning and she could see that this time he was not going to let the matter go.

"I don't see what good could possibly come out of telling Hatori that I am dating his cousin. The very cousin he considers his brother. You know it would cause more harm than good and it would throw up all sorts of questions even you can see that." Mimi pleaded.

Shigure was sick of hearing that excuse and was getting fed up with Mimi and shouted in frustration, "That is such bullshit Mimi and you know it." Then continued in a harsh tone, "Sure it would cause a little upset but everyone would accept it and who cares if anyone asks questions. It's none of their business."

Something inside of Mimi had been opened up by Shigure's forceful reaction and she felt like she was being put on trial and had to defend herself and she replied by telling him her honest feelings, "Oh really. You truly believe that they would accept me jumping from one cousin to the other. Right: especially seeing as how I was accepted and welcomed when Hatori first introduced me to the family."

Shigure could tell that he was finally getting Mimi to open up and he knew that if he pushed harder she would open up completely, ''Everyone did accept you other than Kyoko and Yumiko, but I guess they are the only ones that matter. Forget the fact my parents love you and have from the start and I know they would accept us."

"You know that's not true or fair Shigure." Mimi replied and tried to look away.

Shigure was not going to let her look away and he wanted to look her in the eyes so he could see her true reactions. So he cradled her face in his hands and gently turned her face so Mimi was looking back at him. he waited until she was looking at him before he said, "Then why won't you tell anyone about us. I don't see why we should have to hide the fact we are in love. Especially since I know Motoko and my mother know how we feel about each other."

"I can't hurt Hatori like that. If he knew the whole truth it would crush him," Mimi said quietly because even she was a little ashamed about the feelings that she still harboured for Hatori. No matter how hard she fought against them she still could not shake them. They were hanging on like a cold that you just can't seem to kick no matter how you try.

Shigure was a little hurt by her answer but he expected her to say that. Then he replied, "But it's okay to hurt me? You know what I think. You just don't want to feel guilty for hurting him and after all the shit he has put you through."

"I know deep down Hatori knew there was someone else in my heart for a long time. I think he even suspected I was going to leave him before I found out I was pregnant. I just don't want him to find out I married him because I felt guilty for what we did and I stayed with him because of that guilt and the need to be accepted by Kyoko." As soon a Mimi said the last sentence she wished she hadn't.

Shigure had finally got Mimi to open up and tell him her true feelings and even though he had expected her to tell him everything she had. He was still unprepared for her to tell him that last part and he was shocked, hurt and angry. Shigure could feel his blood pressure began to rise and he released her face from his hands and then griped his hands tightly together as he stared at Mimi, not sure how he should react.

Shigure looked as if Mimi had stabbed him in the heart as he shouted, "What the HELL Mimi! You're telling me the reason you married Hatori and stayed with him for so long was out of guilt and wanting to be accepted. What the hell is wrong with you! Is that the reason you always pushed me away?"

She had been pushed this far and all of a sudden it was like the dam that Mimi had built over the years to hide her true feelings had burst and she was finally able to lay everything out on the line and automatically replied. "I loved Hatori, I still do and I probably always will. Before you and I kissed I couldn't have imagined myself with anyone else. If Hatori had not come when he did I would have run away with you and never looked back, but he did and you didn't say anything to me to let me know how you felt. I was so lost and confused after that. So yes when Hatori asked me to marry him a part of me said yes out of guilt for what we did and for how I had let myself feel about you." Tears started to run down her face. "I knew it then Shigure, when we kissed that night; that I loved you. I just didn't understand how much I loved you. I was so scared of all the feelings I was having for you, so I ran to Hatori instead of facing the truth. I have been avoiding everything for all these years. In the end the guilt and need to atone to Hatori because of the love I felt for you; my need to be accepted by Kyoko, and not wanting to rock the boat won out every time." Mimi dropped to her knees and said "I am so sorry." Mimi had never allowed herself to think long about all of this and she could see her confession was taking its toll on Shigure.

Shigure could barely look at her. He had so much swirling around in his head it made him feel like he was suffocating. "I just don't understand you Mimi. I think there are a lot of things you need to work out and I need to think about everything that has happened as well."

"I'm sorry Shigure. I'm in the process of getting divorced. It's just not the right time to tell everyone about us, please just give me a little more time." Mimi said trying to ease the tension and bring everything back under control.

This had the opposite effect on Shigure and he replied angrily, "Damn it, Amelia that is all I have given you. For the past seven years of my life I have been waiting for you to get over whatever it was you needed to get over and finally be ready to share your life with me. But for whatever reason even now it still seems you are not ready for that."

Mimi could see she was losing Shigure and she wanted to say something that would pull him back but all she could muster up was "But I am ready to share my life with you please believe me." It was pathetic and she knew it and it had no affect on him.

"I wish I could Mimi." Shigure looked at Mimi for a long time trying to decide what to do next. Then he said "I'm going to go back to Hokkaido and I'm going to give you the time and space you need. I know I said I would wait for you until you were ready, but you just might find that when you've finally made up your mind that I've stopped waiting. For God's sake Mimi, you can't possibly imagine how much I love you, but I can't put my life on hold forever waiting for you Mimi."

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