A New Beginning

Chapter 12

Orion:

I see nothing but blackness. It completely surrounds me and I have no clue where I am. I should be terrified but I feel this constant presence near me that keeps me calm. It calls to me like a beacon keeping me here instead of heading towards the bright light that can always be seen out the corner of my eye.

I can't explain what is happening to me. All I know is that here, wherever I may be, I feel no pain. Once I felt it so strongly that I could not tolerate it so in trying to flee from it, I wound up here wherever here is. I try to get closer to this unseen entity just to remain calm, serene since that is what keeps the pain at bay as well.

I hear no sound. I just feel a presence on and off almost constantly. I don't know how long I've been here but today something is different. My left hand tingled a bit and I saw a fog on the opposite side of where the light is at. I feel deep in my soul that I must head towards the fog but just as soon as it appeared, it's gone.

I feel myself begin to fade and everything goes dark again.

Shiloh –

We were thirteen. It was the year where everything began to change for us. We were transitioning from boys to young men and not only were our bodies changing but our emotions as well. For me it was surreal the first time Orion took my hand in his and I felt the electric current that ran through both of us.  I knew he felt it too when his body shook at first touch.

At that age Orion looked like he was in high school. At that age my looks became more delicately defined. That year Orion became so much more overprotective of me than in the past. That year was the year he claimed ownership by taking my hand in his and proudly displaying us as a couple.  I was never happier than in that moment.

I am suddenly pulled out of my memory. I turn towards the door as it abruptly opens and the nurse taking care of Orion for today comes in. Nancy is her name and I smile at her as she returns my smile. "How are we today Shiloh?" "I am much calmer today." "Ah yes, I see you are holding hands." She smiles like a fan girl while staring at our hands.

I think a slight blush comes across my cheeks as she giggles. She walks over to the monitor keeping tabs on Orion while she looks over his vitals. "Well everything is normal. I came to check the slight spike we saw in his monitor but I see nothing out of the ordinary so it's probably just a glitch."

"I did hear the beep get faster but it was quick." "Okay well I'll leave you two alone!" I nod my head at her as she leaves the room. I feel this slight twitch in my hand but when I look over at Orion I find him to still be in the same position as the past three months.  The staff explained that sometime a coma patient can have muscle spasms but Orion has never moved.  It could have been just my imagination.

I haven't really spoken out loud to him. All of my conversations and ramblings have happened in my head but now that I have his hand in mine, I find myself wanting to say things to him. Maybe it will be easier to convey my feelings while he is unconscious.

I start rubbing my thumb on the side of his hand and take comfort in the familiarity of his skin. I know it as well as I know my own and vice versa. I decide to be a bit venturous and run my hand up and down his arm and I hear the machine go off again.

I stop my hand from traveling and everything is all quiet again. Then I hear the intercom come on in his room, "Shiloh, is everything okay?" "Yes, the machine started getting erratic again but there has been no change in Orion." "We are going to send a tech over to take a look at the machines just to make sure there are no issues." "Okay!"

I suddenly feel weird inside my gut.  It is a sort of eerie feeling.  I have this intense feeling that someone is watching me. I look back to the door of the room but it's closed and no one is there. I look back over to Orion and nothing has changed so I decide to just talk to him.

"Ori, I don't know if you can hear me but I miss you, so, so much. I need you to come back to me so I can tell you how sorry I am for the way I handled everything. I should have at least let you know that I just needed time to think but you have to understand that from the moment you came into my life, it became yours."

I can feel the tears begin to fall down my face so I put my hands on his bed and lay my forehead down on them. "When your betrayal came to light, something broke inside of me and even now, I just don't know if I will ever be the same but I do know that I need you here with me because, I love you more than I ever thought possible!"

By now, I am full on sobbing and I hear the machines going off again erratically but I don't care as I let the pain of it all just wash over me. Then out of nowhere, I feel the bed move. It must have been me. 

Then I feel the movement again and as I bring my gaze back up, I see his hand before I feel it caress the side of my face and I now find myself staring into the most ethereal pair of baby blue eyes and I stand quickly and then like a debutante, I faint!