atelophobia | kth + jhs

12

Once, twice. Do it again, over and over again. Don't stop until its all out. Every last bit. Kneel down on the cool cold floor, you've done this before, why are you scared?

Grip your fingers against the rim of the toilet bowl, doesn't this seem familiar? The boy shakily lifts his fingers towards his mouth. Why are you scared? you're pathetic.

One finger, two. They edged further back his throat until his body violently flinched forward, painfully gagging in the process.

That's right, you can feel it coming up your throat, aren't you enjoying this? Soon it will be all over. Now, do it again. Purge it all out.

A small cry left his soft tingling lips, his knuckles turning white from how hard he was gripping the edge of the toilet bowl, almost like his life depended on it.

You're doing it. See? Just a little more, your collarbones will protrude, your wrists will be beautifuly skinny.

The room was filled to the brim with a sense of nausea and a pungent smell. This was your life. You chose this, why would you give up now?

Repeat the process, feel the way your fat filled food slithers back up your throat, the way your stomach acid leaves a burning sensation against your lips, it's all worth it.

The boy lets out a silent scream into the disgusting mess he created, eventually coughing vigorously into his palm which was now tainted with blood.

He was tired. Too tired. Sliding down against the wall he fell to the side, head banging painfully against the cold tiled floor.

His body shook painfully, stomach screaming at him after comitting the unforgivable. Clutching his stomache desperately he thought to himself, 'what a sad world we live in.'

Look at you. No ones going to love you seeing you like this are they? At least tomorrow you'll wake up feeling beautiful. You'll forget about this moment, it will all be a pitch black blur.

He smiled. Yes, smiled. His smile was pained, visibly forced and he looked insane.

Disgusting.

One tear left his eye.

worthless

Two tears left his eye.

Unloved.

A sob escaped his smiling lips, his mouth stained with a constant metallic taste.

Soon it will all be over, just
a little bit longer.