Study Buddy: A Chris & Miya Story

Chapter 73

Miya's Dress in the mm :)

Miya

Fly before you fall x Cynthia Erivo

My fingers brushed past the zipper of my suitcase. I stood up, and glanced around my room. My hands tangled with hair, as I tried to figure out what my exact mood is. I'm trying so hard to be stable. I'm so hard trying to act like everything's okay...

This is all I've ever wanted, right?

I sat down on my bed slowly, and swallowed my nerves.

Everything's over, I thought. This is it.

I reached over my nightstand and grabbed my cap. I twirled with the tassel as I stared blankly at my black heels sprawled out on the carpet.

I inhaled, and exhaled as I landed my feet on the floor. I slowly shuffled my feet towards my full length mirror.

New York in two days, graduation today.

I smoothed out my white dress, and flipped my hair over my shoulders. I shook my head and tried to practice how I would smile, even though on the inside I'm broken.

It just hasn't registered in my head that graduation is today. For some odd reason, my mind can't grasp the idea of it.

Graduation day. The final chapter of it all, my high school career that is. I think it's kind of sad, that as I'm closing my high school career, some of the people I'd know for these four years will be nothing but a memory.

I fix my cap on my head, and adjust it. Then I grab my gown and throw it on. I glanced down and then looked up to see my eyes staring back at me in my reflection.

Numb to the fact the life moves at such a fast pace, and numb to the fact the life waits for nobody... I don't know if I'm ready, but the universe sure doesn't care.

I held my heels in my hand, as I walked down the stairs. I should be excited. I get to deliver my speech that I've been working so hard on. I get to complete my high school career on a good note, academic wise. Then afterwards I'm going to celebrate with my family and friends.

I tried to force positive thoughts into my head, as I walked into the kitchen.

"Hey dad." I smile slightly. "I'm ready to go."

He looks up from his phone, and at me. "Okay." He says. "You alright?" He asks with a smile.

I watch him, stand up and adjust his tie.

"Yeah, just a little nervous." I said, followed by a nervous laugh.

I smooth out my white dress. It didn't need to be smoothed out anyway. I just didn't know what to do with my hands.

"Aw, don't be! You worked hard on your speech, I'm pretty sure you'll do great." He encouragingly says while giving me a tight hug.

Yeah, my speech. That's exactly what I'm nervous about, nothing else! (Sarcasm, of course.) I'm completely flipping out about everything.

His words were just enough to get me out the door, but not enough to hold me through the whole day... I know that for sure.

Seeing everyone in their cap and gown is such a beautiful site. But the arena is packed.

All these bodies of people made me feel exhausted and drained. I was excited upon entering, but then my mood flipped. I became more and more anxious, feeling like I might have a panic attack.