9:55am
I felt anxious throughout my entire meditation. I couldn't stop thinking about what I need to do and all the money I need to spend on “necessities”. I thought about how things are about to change and I don't know if it's for the better. I worried about what it will be like at 40th street and If I'll like it and be good at it. I wondered if I'll be trained or if they'll just expect me to be able to follow recipes and improvise. I thought about how I “screwed” the other location by leaving so abruptly, but that I don't want to spend my time somewhere that stresses me out and adds to my anxiety. Shouldn't I be more steady? After nearly a month of meditating regularly, I don't feel anymore centered or calm. If anything it's the opposite, like I can't settle for less anymore. Like I can't pretend anymore.
YOU ARE READING
Meditations
Non-FictionI started to meditate to help with my anxiety, but as I learned more about meditation, it opened my mind up in unexpected ways. This book is a simple guide to starting your meditation practice and a log of my spiritual journey.
