Diary Entry - Eundeok Married Life (Baekhera) [COMPLETED]

Can I ride again?

Eun's diary

Mother wants to renovate our room again...this time saying she needs to add underground heater so I won't catch a cold even when I kick the blanket at night...like since when did I ever do that? But there's no point arguing so I suggested going on a trip, but she won't allow it. She said Soondeok and I need to stay over at Soondeok's old house! Imagine! Living in the same house as her scary, monstrous father! And imagine all the things I have to do with Soondeok to impress him and make him think we're in good terms...I don't know why the rush, but mother wants us to move out tomorrow! I really can't understand her sometimes. Oh, by the way, ever since mother saw me and Soondeok acting the way we did, she stopped talking about how I should be nice to Soondeok. Perfect! I knew this would work! Where were we? Oh, right, so mother said we should take this opportunity to clean out my room, meaning I'll have to start packing things now. I'll need to move my things, all my precious toys, into the store room if I won't be bringing them. The maids are busy helping Soondeok so I suppose I will need to do them myself, I won't let them touch my stuff anyway. Mother keeps telling me to visit the king often, she must've heard how I've yelled at the king and left in anger last time. She said that I need to still at least respect him as a king if not a father. I suppose if that'll make mother feel better, I'll pay a visit, but I really hate entering the palace right now, especially when the king is sick and everyone's talking about throne succession and stuff. What a boring business! Can't they just let the crown prince get the throne already? It's not like being the king is a good thing anyway.

Soondeok's diary

What a wonderful idea! Mother said she'll have someone add the floor heater so our room, especially the bed, will be warm all winter, that way Eun won't catch a cold that easily. And what made me happy the most is that I could stay over in my old place again! On top of that, Bogum will be returning for his holiday, that means I can spend my days with him! It's going to be so nice catching up with each other. Prince So is back from Jin as well! He went there as ambassador last year and is finally back! He promised to take me hunting on our wedding...let's hope he remembers. But first, I'll have to be able to ride...ever since what happened at the temples last year, I can't bring myself to ride anymore...as well as touching my bow and arrows. I've asked the doctor about it once and he said I've been traumatized...I hope I can get over it soon. I used to love riding so much...that time when the prince and I raced each other, I want to relive that moment so badly...but every time I get on a horse, I'll tremble, have cold sweat and won't be able to open my eyes. Maybe I should return to that village, visit the family and see how they're doing. That way I'll feel better and will perhaps get well? We'll be leaving tomorrow so I'll need to pack everything up today – it won't be just simple packing, we'll literally have to transfer everything to the store room because the entire floor will be worked on. I guess I'll start with my study first – I may not need to bring a lot of books with me since daddy's library has tonnes of books already. I've been thinking about what the king had said when we met a week ago...what is it that the queen fears of Eun? Why did she do that to him? If I were to deal with it, will mother regain her title? What secret did Eun had to hide from me?