Maybe Then...

Chapter 1: if I were a better person

If I were a better, more meaningful person,

maybe then, life wouldn't have turned out this way.

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I sat on the edge of the porch, staring absentmindedly out at the big, slumping oak tree that sat on the yard. Each breath I took felt like a fight against the tears as I forced myself to accept the fact that I was here, and this place was what I would call home from now on. That was the reality that I had to accept, whether I liked it or not. They say that home is where the heart is, but honestly, it felt like my heart was where my home really is, and I was pried away from it.

Evington was where I grew up. It's where I spent my childhood. My first friends, my first crushes, my first pets, various life lessons, and so many memories. Why did grandpa have to move us? Couldn't he have retired back home?

Really, though, I knew the answer to that. The only thing that kept him there was a good paying job, and me wanting to live there. And since the old chiropractors office forced him into retirement before shutting down, one half of the reasons to stay was gone.

I liked Aunt Ruby and Uncle Jason's house. I liked their town. I loved coming to visit them. But it just didn't feel like home.

The screen door creaked open in the midst of my drifting thoughts. I didn't even bother to look up to see who is was; my gaze still didn't waiver from the tree.

"Amelia?" Aunt Ruby said softly. "What are you doing?"

"Grandpa said I needed to get some fresh air," I muttered.

She took a seat next to me, my eyes still staring at the tree in front of me.

"I know it's hard to move," she began with a sigh. "And I know it's only been two days, and you're still getting settled in."

I waited for her to continue, but she only sat there in silence.

I turned to her, seeing that she was now also staring ahead at the tree. "I know, I should still do something."

She turned to me with kind eyes. "I wasn't expecting you to go out and do something, Amelia. It's a new town, and you don't many people here."

"Yeah," I agreed. I turned my eyes back to the tree again.

"But," she sighed as she hoisted herself up, "I still don't want you to get yourself in a slump."

I sighed, knowing she was right. What was I to do, though? It was summer, so it's not like I could meet kids at school. I wasn't going to go and join a gang or a club. I wasn't going to go around the neighborhood on a bike asking everyone that looked about 16 if they wanted to be my friend.

I wasn't good at meeting new people, and back home, my friends were usually people I had known from my neighborhood or school, a lot of them people I'd known for years.

I was a stranger here.

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"Ruby, I just don't know what to do about that girl anymore," I heard grandpa say in a hushed tone.

I was in the bathroom, minding my own business as I, well, did my business, when I heard the mention of a 'girl.' Now, I know eaves dropping isn't right, but in all fairness, they must have been talking about me. Aside from my little cousin Clarice and aunt Ruby, I was the only girl in the house.

I figured that if they were possibly talking behind my back while I was taking a dump, maybe I wouldn't be the only one in the wrong by listening in on their conversation.

"Mark, it hasn't even been a week," aunt Ruby said in her gentle voice. Her soothing voice was definitely fitting for her occupation as a dentist's receptionist. I'd much rather hear her voice while checking in for a root canal than a tired tone and a blank stare.

I heard him sigh.

The mere possibility of him being disappointed in me made me even more disappointed in myself.

I didn't hear what they said next as I washed my hands up and walked out of bathroom and up the stairs, acting as though I didn't even know they were talking in the first place.

But I still knew that I had been the topic of their discussion, and most certainly not in a positive manner. I was talked about as a problem, and I hate being a problem to someone.

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Hey guys! Thank you so much for reading! I know this was a short and solemn chapter, but I just needed to give you some understanding of why she had to move, where she moved, ect.
I swear, the story will get more light hearted as it goes, although there will be some sad moments, as I am trying to make it seem realistic.
This is my first novel, so please don't be afraid to correct me on mistakes. Feel free to share your thoughts.