WARNING ⚠️ I'm about to punch you right in the feels and I'm not joking. Get your tissues ready because it's gonna be a tough one. Also lupe060301 this is one for you but I wrote another for you as well which will be coming this week xx
"I'm really sorry but your baby was born still, my condolences." They were the words that broke Perrie and Alex's hearts on October 12th 2020.
She was perfect, tiny but perfect. Her face was a frozen calm, lips together, cheeks slightly chubby, eyelids shut. 10 fingers were made to curl around the finger of her mother's. 10 toes hidden under the socks that Perrie had squealed about at her baby shower. Light brown hair dusted the top of her head beneath a lilac hat that her grandma had knitted and minuscule eyelashes formed protection for the eyes that would never see how beautiful the world was. Her chest didn't rise and fall and her feet didn't kick. She was just calm, almost sleeping.
Her broken mother sang a lullaby as she wept and her father cradled the tiny body that would never grow.
Taking her away was the hardest part, both parents falling into fresh heartbreak that no one but each other could draw them out of. Though it was a place of loss the room was filled with love and peace, as the two cuddled close to fill the void that had been formed in their hearts.
She was named at 9:52 am on the 13th of October as Evangeline Joy, a name meaning joyful angel, something that they both believed their baby would be.
Going home was a difficult endeavour, both of them falling at the sight of their baby ready home. Alex placed down the empty car seat at the door, taking his wife into his arms as they wept, Evangeline watching them from the sky, wrapping her arms around them tightly, nuzzling her face into Perrie's hair.
The funeral bought closure. Everyone gaining an opportunity to say goodbye to the angel in their own way. There were moments when they knew Evangeline was with them. The sun shone down despite it being November and they were graced with a rainbow as they placed her in the ground. They placed seeds in the fresh soil, so her grave was a place of joy not heartbreak. The words 'eternally loved' engraved on the stone, as well as a heart.
As the weeks went by the pain dulled, never quite leaving them just hanging in a space in their heart. The nursery door remained closed, a box of items that the hospital had given them with things to do with Ev sat in the centre, for when the pain was dull enough to open it.
When the pain was dull enough they sat on the pink rug together and opened it, tears falling at the first image; her feet next to Alex's hands. There were other images; Perrie holding her, her lips, her hands, their wedding rings next to her. The lilac hat was there and when Alex lifted it to his nose he could smell her scent very faintly. The first blanket she had been wrapped in was folded and the texture of the material brought Perrie comfort as she cried. The socks were there too, a footprint and hand print framed with them. The final items were the hospital bracelet and both her certificate of birth and death. They held each other tight, letting it all out.
Their fans found out two months after, in beautiful posts by the both of them;
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