Pasensya na,
kung papatulugin na muna
Ang pusong napagod kakahintay~
Kaya sa natitirang
segundong kayakap ka,
Maaari bang magkunwaring
akin ka pa~
- - -
Four years ago, Mika and I got married in Vegas because it was the only place that allows same sex marriage the year we decided to tie the knots.
It's been five years but we're still childless, because Mika said that she still wants to feel the freedom even though she's married to me.
Freedom; that's what I took from her, as she always say, especially when intoxicated.
"You took away my freedom, Alyssa! I don't even want to marry you!"
That's what she said on the first night of our honeymoon.
I stopped letting her get too many drinks after that incident, not because I don't want her drunk but because I don't want to hear the truth.
The painful truth that the girl I married isn't in love with me.
Our marriage was arranged – I guess that was obvious. It was between me and her parents.
-
"Ly, this is the only way we can assure you na babawi kami," tita Bhaby said as she was squeezing my hand.
"Hija, I would understand kung hindi ka papayag," tito Lito trailed off, "But if we won't do this, we will lose everything."
"Give us five years, hija," tita Bhaby continued, "We'll be back on our feet after that."
"Alam niya po ba ito?" I asked curiously.
"Not yet," tito Lito lowered his head, "Hindi ko binibenta ang anak ko sa'yo, Alyssa. Gusto ko lang naman na habang inaayos namin ang mga problema namin ay nasa puder mo sya. Ayoko lang mahirapan ang anak ko."
He was close to tears, but tita Bhaby was already weeping. I knew right then that this wasn't easy for them.
"Five years huh," I repeated, "Mabilis lang naman ang panahon. I guess it's okay."
"O-okay lang sa'yo, hija?" tito Lito asked in disbelief, "She might despise you for this."
"Or she might have feelings for me, too," I said positively.
Tito Lito and his wife looked at me with worried gazes.
"I love Mika as well, tito, I would do anything for her. Ayoko ring mahirapan siya," I said assuringly, "I'll call my attorney, Dzi, para sa mga papeles."
Right after that, tito Lito almost jumped at me and gave me a tight hug. He was crying.
"Thank you so much," he whispered.
"Anything for your daughter, sir," I whispered back.
-
Anything for Mika.
Where were we? Oh right, honeymoon.
We didn't consummate that night. I couldn't, especially when she was crying the whole night beside me in our bed, murmuring someone else's name.
"I love you so much, Aereen."
That was all I told her that night as I hold her body near mine.
