Emotionless

Little Heart Big Bullies

I was in class drawing minding my own business. It was kindergarten a year where all the next generation begins school. Unfortunately in my generation it's shitty. "Hey look! Its her!" I heard someone whispered. "She's creepy!" Another said. "She's always calm and doesn't smile!" I heard another. "She's a freak! She even rarely talks!" Another spoke. All these comments did not bother me for which I am different from the others. Different too even play with them and have a nice game of tag. I always end up being inside when it's recess. I have no one to call a friend or to go to for help. I'm mostly alone and that's what I've been used to. But today I decided to be outside for which it looked nice out.

"Hey freak!!!" I heard someone yelled at me. "Huh?" I turned around but I was pushed harshly to the ground. I winced in pain, feeling the stinging sensation on my elbow and knees. I have to stay calm. Tears began to build up in my eyes. "Look! The freak is crying!" Another pointed it out. "N-no.....I-I'm.....n-not!!!" I peeped out stuttering. "What did you saw freak!" One yelled. Someone kicked me in the stomach causing me to scream in pain. "St-stop! Pl-pl-please!" I managed to say. But they didn't. They kept on kicking me over and over again. "St-st-stop!?!?" I tried to scream out. Nothing. The pain was unbearable. They all suddenly stopped and one picked me up and shoved me hard, down into the mud. "Eat that you freak!?" The person shoving me into the mud yelled. The others stood their and laugh. Stay calm.....stay calm....stay calm. "Freak! Freak! Freak! Freak! Freak!" They all chanted out. After they were done shoving me into the mud I heard the sound of something being unzipped. Next thing something warm and wet is being sprayed on me. I laid there clenching my chest as hard as I can. Stay calm, stay calm, stay calm!? After they were done I was kicked one last time then they walked off laughing and continued to make fun of me.

I sit up and wiped my tears. I was covered in mud and piss along with blood and bruises. My hair that was nicely done in pigtails are now sagged and tangled. My once cleaned clothes are now dirty and disheveled. This isn't fair......why me? Why do I have to be in this situation? It hurts so much.

I was now in my room leaning against the door hearing the war between my parents. "This is your fucking fault!!!!" My father yelled. "My fault!?!! How the fuck this is my fault!?!! Our kid was beaten senseless in school!?!?" My mother yelled back. My parents continued to bicker at each other as I leaned against the door of my dark empty room. The only light I got was the light of the moon. I held tightly to my favorite bear which was a white teddy bear that has a red ribbon around it's neck I had him ever since I could remember. "UGH!?!! I don't see why I love you!?!?" My father screamed. "Then why don't you leave us!?!?" My mother yelled. "Then I will!?!!?" My father yelled back. I heard the sound of stomping followed by a door slamming afterwards. I hugged my bear tightly close to my chest. "It's okay softybear......will make it out together......because your my best friend in the whole world.....the only friend that will stay by my side forever." I said to my teddy bear, "I promise.....will go to a place where there is happiness, love, and no more hurting." I got up and went to my bed and fell asleep with one single blanket which was thin but I refused to give it up for which it was my favorite. I slept with a few tears in my eyes and was consumed by the wonderful land I so wished to stay there forever and never leave.

Why can no one understand me?.....