Dressed In Black

Closure

"Why would you ask that?"

"I just...come here." I beckoned him to me and he came in, closing the door behind him.

He sat on the bed next to me.

"I just have to wonder why, out of every other woman out there, you're deciding to be with me. Especially with how complicated I am and how hard everything;s going to be for us. I don't get it."

"You don't have to get it. I want you, Allison. You don't have to worry about that. You've been around me for a long time, and you've seen all the women I've been with since--"

"You're not helping."

"Sorry, I'm trying to make a point. Have you ever seen me this way with any of them? You're not like them, and I like that. Everything Aaron said is right, though it concerns me. When I was gone all I wanted to do was get back to you. That's something I haven't had."

"But is any of that worth what I'm putting you through? Taking you away from your work because I'm stressed or upset? Making you worry about Me? I feel like a giant burden on you and I hate it."

"look. Do you want this?" his voice was quiet now as he drew patterns on the palm of my hand. I looked up to him, focused intently on what he was drawing.

"Of course I do. But do you?" he huffed and looked at me, running his thumb along my cheek.

"Yes, Allison. I wish you would just believe me."

"I do. I just worry. You know my head." he dipped his head to kiss me.

"I do. You're so stubborn sometimes." he pulled me into a hug and then laid down beside me.

"How are you feeling today?"

"Yknow. Getting over the shock, realizing what this all means." I bit my lip. "I keep wanting to call him and talk about this but then I realize that it's not going to work." I choked back some tears and he shushed me, touching his forehead to mine. My phone rang just then. Zak reached over to his night table and grabbed it for me

"Stephanie." he said, as he handed it over. A picture of Liam and his wife popped up, them smiling and laughing. This was fucking hard.

I took a deep breath before I answered, not knowing how it was going to go. I sat up and Zak did as well, scooting toward me and rubbing my back and I slid my finger across the screen to answer the call.

"Hello?"

"Alli, hi. I'm sorry I didn't call sooner and that Elisabeth was the one to tell you. I couldn't do it. It's taken me a lot to call you even right now."

"I understand. What happened?"

"Drunk driver. Late night. We're having the funeral two days from now, you can stay with us, and you can bring that Zak guy if you'd like. Liam told me you guys might be something."

"Unfortunately I didn't get to tell him, but we're together now. Not publicly but...I wish I could've told him." Zak squeezed me tight and kissed my cheek, cuddling his head into me.

"I wish I could've told him a lot of things." she paused for a minute, collecting herself I'd guess. I was in a similar boat. "I'm sorry Allison, i've got to go. I'll see you soon. We love you."

"Love you." I hung up and laid into Zak.

"I've got to fly to DC. If you want to come--"

"I'll be there for you." He cut me off.

"You don't have to." I assured him, shaking my head.

"Yes, I do. Hush." God, I was lucky to have him. He certainly had his moments where we didn't get along, or his ego was too big, or he was needlessly rude and snarky, but he also had moments like this where he would sacrifice his time and fears to help out someone else. And right now, he was what I needed.