The next morning he texted if I wanted to have breakfast at the Espresso House near his apartment.
N: I'm sorry. I should have told you about Berlin and art school.
W: I just don't want to have a long-distance relationship. I think we've been away from each other enough. And I mean its hard as it is now, not seeing you every day always and you are only a 15-minute walk away. Berlin is like another country.
N: But, you can transfer.
W: No, I cant. I am tied to Oslo for at least another two years. I am already in the program and the assistant position I agreed to do is starting in May so I cant just leave now.
We were sitting in silence, staring at each other from across the table. I took his hand in mine. He smiled with his eyes and continued even calmer then he was at the start of the conversation.
W: But, I mean what happened? Last summer all we talked about was how we were gonna move in together when you graduate Nissen and start college. We looked and dreamed about apartments and different parts of the city.
N: I just...
W: And at New Years you were all hyped about the idea, walking around at the party telling everyone.
N: Truth be told, I was more scared then hyped.
W: Scared of what?
N: Scared of repeating mistakes. Scared of the living together-part, seeing each other every day. We did that once before remember.
He looked at me like finally understanding everything. And I finally feel like letting go, telling him my worst nightmare. That we'll lose each other. That he'll leave my life again.
W: Noora, the last time we lived together it was solemnly on my premises. And truth be told we barely knew each other, and that's never a good ground for moving in together no matter how much we loved each other. And then the Nico thing. I mean all things that are out of this world or different now.
N: Do you know how many high school couples survive out in the real world? None.
W: Then we'll improve that statistic.
I looked up at him, surprised that he said it like that. I went over to sit beside him all the while smiling, heart in place again, and kissed him.
