One Shots ❦ Camren + Others

#1.5: Marinero

Part Two

***

Mientras me dabas tu corazón,
Yo era un marinero buscando, amor,
Iba por cada puerto como si nada,
Entre más olas, más naufragaba...

***

Lauren pushed the door opened to her hotel room and saw her best friend sitting on the floor, speaking to someone over the phone. When she saw the distraught look on her friend's face, she didn't even tell the person she was hanging up. She just did it.

"You saw her didn't you," Normani stated. She didn't even have to ask, just the glistening eyes, the quivering lips were enough to tell her that she crossed paths with the love of her life.

Lauren couldn't even respond, she just shook her head and threw herself on the bed crying. Her friend got up and sat next to her without saying anything. She rubbed her back soothingly.

"She doesn't hate me. Why doesn't she hate me?!" Lauren asked through her sobs. Sitting up, she looked at Normani. "She still loves me. Why?"

Normani shrugged. "I don't know. Sometimes the person who hurts you the most is still the one who is going to love you the most. Even though they shouldn't love you."

While Camila had been giving Lauren her heart, she gladly accepted it, but her old habits and her traits were always there. Resurfacing. No matter how much she tried for them not too.

She tried.

Believe me, she tried so hard for Camila, but things didn't work out like they wanted. The forever they promised each other wasn't going to happen.

"I loved her too, you know? You know that, right Mani?" Lauren asked her friend looking for someone to say 'yes, I knew you loved her too. I knew you weren't that much of an asshole to play with her feelings.'

Normani nodded.

Lauren needed that confirmation.

"Could we have gotten what we wanted if we had just been honest? Why can't we just be honest? We weren't meant for each other," she hit the bed with her fist. "We weren't meant for each other, but I want her. I still love her, okay? That's not a lie. I want her with every fibre of my being, but I can't want her you know? Relationships were never my thing. She has such a pure heart, I can't hurt her. I can't cause her anymore pain."

Her friend sighed and grabbed Lauren's hand right before she was about to punch the bed frame. "You could've gotten what you wanted, maybe. But what you did, it wasn't right, Laur. You cheated on her. She forgave you, but you guys broke up. Then you caught her kissing your best friend. Y'all got back together. You fought, and you fought. Every. Single. Day," she punctuated each word. "Does that not constitute for a toxic relationship?"

Lauren sighed. "Soy un idiota, mi papel fue lastimarte," she ran her hand through messy hair, and shrugged. "But I love her."

Normani smiled sadly at her friend. "First things first, you're not an idiot. And secondly, because you love her, that's why you decided to go your separate ways. Because you love her, you decided to let her go. You both deserve something mentally and emotionally stable." Lauren shook her head 'no' and opened her mouth to speak but Normani cut her off. "You know it's true."

"I'm not the one to love, Mani and she managed to break through my walls, she managed to make me want something with her. I can't let that go. It's been four years, what if things were going to be different?"

This was a question that plagued her mind continuously for a year or two now.

Would things have actually been different if they did try again?