One Shots ❦ Camren + Others

#9: Let You Love Me

And every time it gets too real,
And every time I feel like sabotaging,
I start running again,
And every time I push away,
I really wanna say that I'm sorry,
But I say nothing...

***

Sometimes, the kind of love that can only last for so long, is the kind that somehow can take a lifetime to get over.

"You know," Camila began. She was smiling at Lauren, looking at her with nothing but love in her eyes. "Try as you might, Jauregui. But you will let me love you, one day. I promise you that."

Don't shame someone for their feelings.

Feelings aren't wrong and you invalidating them by saying they shouldn't feel a certain way only adds on to the hurt that they have inside.

Be there for them, and don't rush them.

All they need to know is that you will stay, even though the one they loved the most didn't.

"And what if I don't?" Lauren countered back. "What if you chasing after me wouldn't be worth it? What if you waiting for me and at the end of the day, I don't come?"

Camila rocked on her heels, and pondered for a moment. "You'll always be worth it, Lauren. In a thousand lifetimes, I would do this all again. I know you're scared, and believe me, I am too. Love is one hell of a scary thing, but we can be scared together, no?"

"No."

Camila snorted. "Damn, girl. If I didn't feel the way I feel about you, I would be deeply offended right now."

Lauren had a small smile tugging at her lips, but she tried to suppress it. "You do know you can do a lot better than me, right?"

"You do know you can't do any better than me, right?" Camila winked at her. "You should probably head to work. It's getting late." She placed a kiss on Lauren's cheek. Her lips lingering for a moment. Lauren would be lying if she said she didn't feel something every time Camila kissed her, but she tried her best to ignore it.

But sometimes that was easier said than done.

"I'll see you around, Cabello."

Camila smiled. "You will. I'm not going anywhere. You have my heart, so I'm always going to be with you."

"Cheesy."

Camila laughed. "It's who's I am as a person. See you, Jauregui."

***

"I can't imagine a life without you," Lauren remembered him telling her. But now, it's three years later, and she's trying to wipe the mascara from her cheeks, knowing his name would never pop up on her phone again. Knowing she'll never see him again.

And the thing is, Lauren was no longer holding on to false hope. She knew that he wasn't coming back and she knew that she needed to move on. But it was the fear of getting hurt again that kept holding her back.

It's bittersweet isn't it?

The moment you realise you're no longer holding on.

The moment you realise that you're no longer hoping for them to come to their senses.

But now, what does the future hold for you? Where do you go from here?

Being with someone new is scary. You have to learn their likes, dislikes, what makes them laugh until tears form in their eyes, or what keeps them up at night. You have to relearn all these things and it's scary having to give yourself to someone else. Because all you ever wanted was the one person who didn't want you.