Playing for Rya

32. Smoke and Mirrors

Song: Never be the same by Camilla Cabello; cover by Emma Heesters.

The palatial villas located on the east side of the resort were by far the most grandly built residences the resort boasted, the villas were scattered across massive acres of secluded and private beach space and possessed the most exquisite views of the ocean.

It was within the walls of one of these outhouses Derek stood gazing through the vast windows of the ground floor living room and out at the beautiful orange sky that ushered the break of dawn.

At the time he'd taken up a membership, he'd been pressed to consider purchasing one of the villas, but at the time it had seemed a needless expense buying and staffing a lavish villa for just his use when he had no idea how often he would visit. It was the same logic he'd used in making the decision to purchase his New York apartment.

But things had changed, and there were things in his life that needed to follow suit, decisions he'd made in the past that he needed to reassess...

He clasped his hands behind his back, frowning slightly as he silently processed his thoughts, his reassessment of his choice of residence or a vacation home wasn't his primary worry at the moment.

His present dilemma was the two women in his life, both of whom he cared greatly for and one of whom he would ultimately have to let go.

He'd put off making a decision on the issue for as long as he could, yet as the days, weeks and months passed since Arya came back into his life, the thought of letting either one of them go had proved more and more to be a daunting decision he didn't want to take.

And he hadn't needed to, until now.

Now the decision that had weighed heavily on his mind for months, had come to a head.

He was losing her, the distance in her eyes the evening before as he'd carted her away from the barn back to his penthouse had cut through him, and though she hadn't said much, he'd sensed a wall between them while she'd showered and before he'd put her to bed.

He didn't know what was going on and why she'd reacted the way she had, but he was determined to get to the bottom of it.

The distance he felt from her wasn't the only thing that bothered him, he also hadn't heard from Beverly in two days, an unusual occurrence considering that they spoke daily. Yet so far, she hadn't returned his calls and his messages had gone unanswered and the longer her silence went on, coupled with Arya's burgeoning distance, the more he felt he was losing both of the women he cared about.

Despite his lifestyle and his rumored playboy reputation, having two women in his life, both of whom he was carrying on a serious relationship with, wasn't an ideal situation for him, especially considering that he hadn't, as yet, been able to look Beverly in the eye and tell her that she wasn't the only woman in his life anymore.

That thought in itself left a bitter taste in his mouth as he wondered how that conversation with her would go. So far, he'd taken measures to keep certain aspects of his life from her, to keep hidden, the dark desires he had that he was almost certain would send her running for the hills.

And so far he'd succeeded, even managed for so long to curb his dangerous edge, his hunger for more...for her sake, for their sake, because he hadn't wanted to lose her, to lose yet another woman he cared for to his darkness.

She come into his life at a time when he'd been unaware of how much he needed someone and something other than a one night stand with nameless, faceless women, a time when he'd been craving comfort, a return to normalcy...a time when he'd been unable to find his way out of the dark hole Arabella's unexpected disappearance had thrown him into.