Stalker | KomaHina

Chapter 20

a/n: I didn't write nor post for quite a long while, I was.. well, mainly just procrastinating in this matter tbh x'3 Writing takes lots of time and I'm not always motivated and inspired to  spend hours before my laptop on it ;u; But from now on I plan to write and post more frequently..! (wish me luck, hehe—) 

The art above is the very first fanart which was created basing on my fanfic! (I was and still am extremely honored that I and my fanfic received such ://3) It was drawn by HorizonTraveller a long time ago! She's also the one who created the art which I used as the cover with her allowance! <3 I love it sm, it's so perfect, cute and adorable hgnnn-- x//3 *fangirls* I love everything about it—starting from expression and ending on his kimono and makeup—and thought that not sharing with it here, in my story on wattpad, would be a sin! >://c  

 A-anyway~ here's the chapter! 

- 2 hours later -

"..agito.. N-Na.." I gasped out visibly exhausted while falling onto my knees. He stopped in place (since he couldn't move forward anymore because of me) and looked back at me. He had been holding my hand for two hours already and dragging me into various places, from one to another.. he was pretty much acting like an excited kid who was experiencing something for the very first time. It can sound as if I was finding it tiring or troublesome.. but I wasn't at all, to be honest. I enjoyed seeing this innocent and pure side of his. The first hour of walking around had been even pretty much fun for the both of us, but when another one had passed by, I thought that it's a good moment for us to get a rest or something.

"Hmm?" he tilted his head. "Is there something wrong, Hajime?" he kneeled next to me and helped me to stand up from my knees with him.

"Y-yeah.. my feet, my back, my pretty much everything hurts as fuck..." I complained while sighing.

"I-I see.." he frowned deeply with guilt written all over his face. "Should I carry you to my place then, H-" I shook my head energetically. I knew he suggested it because he was plainly concerned about me, but I just didn't want him to do that. It was too embarrassing.

"N-no, no, no..! I'm good!" I said firmly accenting that I wasn't up to his offer. "I think.. I'll go back home actually." I said after a moment of hesitation.

"Huh." He strengthened the grip on my hand. "Y-your home..?" he asked while looking down. I whined a bit feeling that the grip was a bit too forceful. "Yeah, what's wrong? Where else should I go..?" I tilted my head confused. Nagito was sometimes too hard for me to get. Wait. Who am I kidding, haha. He was almost always confusing me.

"W-we can.. go back together to my house..?" he gulped down and shyly looked into my eyes trying to guess how I felt about his suggestion. But to be honest.. I wasn't up to going back with him. At this point, I got what he was getting at. "Maybe some other time?" I answered sheepishly. "I'm sorry, Nagito, but when I'm with you, it's too hard for me to relax.. believe me." I laughed remembering many examples of that. It wasn't his fault, mostly, I was just feeling tensed up around him, being over conscious about the things he might've done to me and so on.

He let go of my hand and avoided eye contact. "I-I see.. b-but we'll see each other soon, right?" he asked after taking some time. He seemed to feel down about me going away. I felt bad for making him feel like that, but well.. we had just started dating (if I can call it dating), did he expect me to sleep at his place each and every night? I wasn't ready for anything like that yet. He still was.. a stalker. Even though I loved him, past didn't change. It's not like I didn't forgive him those things.. I just needed to have a while.. a long while to slowly develop trust for him.

I kissed his forehead soothingly. "We will, don't worry!" I smiled softly at him and then frowned. "You won't break into my house, will you?" I asked him trying to assure myself that I would get a good rest tonight. After I had confessed to him I didn't think much about his stalker habits, but maybe I should have?

"..." there was this long, suspicious and worrying silence, but finally he said "I can't, can I?" he answered me with a question; sadness was clear in his voice. "H-Hajime would hate me if I did that... I-I don't want to lose you, especially not now th-that.. a-ahh.." he looked into my eyes. They say that the eyes are the mirror of the soul.. I don't know how much truth there is in it, but just by one look into his eyes, I could sense all the pain he was holding back so desperately. At least that was my assumption, I could be mistaken about the feeling I sensed by looking into his light greyish eyes. I don't.. don't want to see him like this... but I can't give him what he wants, I can't give him my whole self, n-not yet. I need some more time, Nagito, please, stop looking like this at me.. you make it so much harder for me.

"Ehh.. don't make such a face. Please." I said finally giving in. "I-I'll stop by your place tomorrow after I get back from work, okay?" I looked on the side while playing with my bangs a bit. Wait-- I didn't use to have bangs. I need to go to the hairstylist, haha. I smiled awkwardly. He hugged me tightly. "Ahh, I'm so happy, Hajime!" he said while tightening the hug even more and squeezing me so hard that I was barely able to breathe. "I'll be waiting for you, my love~" he announced cheerfully. He apparently cheered up after hearing that we'd see each other already tomorrow, it relieved me a lot. 

"Awwww, thank you." I blushed a bit and smiled sincerely. Hearing that he would, made me feel that pleasant warmth in my chest. "I-I just want to give you back the kimono.. i-it's not like I'd miss you!" I said while coughing a bit. I didn't want to make him feel too worked up about my visit. He leaned back and kissed me. "Hajime is the cutest tsundere, hehe~" he said while smirking at me. He looked through my lie, it seems. Why did he need to call me a tsundere though? I wasn't a tsundere? I-I think. 

"You can keep the kimono, you know?" he caressed the clothing on my waist and trace his hand down. "It suits you so good, hehe~" his laugh was a bit cringy, just a bit. I didn't dislike it, but it was making it feel as if he was thinking of some perverted stuff and that was exactly what I didn't really like. "I-I'll keep it then.." I said feeling a bit thankful. Even tho I didn't really enjoy wearing kimonos I was still thankful that he wanted to present it to me.

"You will stop by my place either way, right?" he kissed my neck softly. I let out a short sigh. "Y-yeah, I guess.." I ruffled his hair. "I already said that I would, so well, hehe." I didn't want to admit that I wanted to see him tomorrow as much as he wanted to see me.. probably as much. He was hard for me to read, as I said.

"Th-then.. see you tomorrow." I said while trying to wriggle out from the tight hug. "M-mhm~" he purred into my ear finally yet not really gladly letting me go. "Be careful!" he said as I started heading to my home and the distance grew bigger between us. He waved at me. I smiled at him from far away and nodded assuring him that I would be.

As soon as I got home I fell onto my bed. I was so exhausted that I totally forgot about washing off the makeup and brushing my teeth. I didn't even bother myself to take off the kimono. The smell of my own sheets was pretty nostalgic; I hadn't been in my house for the whole day after all.. the silence of it was also pretty much so. Thanks to Nagito I hardly ever could have such a peaceful rest. "A-ahh.. so that's silence, hehe.." I smiled silly to myself while turning on my back and reaching my hands up as if I wanted to touch the ceiling with them. It's kinda lonely.. I was surprised that I thought so. I usually was the type to enjoy the silence. Yet.. lately Nagito was changing me and making me feel in need of his presence and affection.

"Okay.. I guess it's time to.." I'd fallen asleep before I managed to say 'sleep'.