Love at first sight (Heisuke x OC)

Chapter 46: Tension-causing change + Mini Chapter (read beginning for details)

Heya!

This time I'm doing things a little differently! This chapter will be made up of two chapters, one regular length and one mini, within the same part. The titles of the chapters will be in bold before the chapter begins so you'll definitely know when one has ended and when the other has started.

With that being said, I hope you enjoy these chapters!

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Chapter 46, part 1: Tension-causing change

{After the whole poison and drug fiasco, I returned back to the Shinsengumi headquarters in Fudodo Village. Needless to say, everyone was relieved when they saw me alive and well. So much so that when Nagakura suggested a party, Hijikata agreed with him. The party was great, but men will be men meaning most of them fell asleep at the party due to drinking too much.}

I was now in my room, getting ready for bed when a knock sounded at my door. "Hey Chiyeko, it's Harada and Nagakura. Can we come in?"
"Just wait there a few seconds please!" I quickly did up my sleeping kimono, put my haori on and slid open the door for the two to enter.
"Gomen for showing up unannounced" Harada promptly apologised, whereas his friend...
"Damn, am I glad you're here" Nagakura expressed in a tone of relief. "I'm getting tired of this grumpy old wet blanket"
"Funny, I was thinking the same thing" Harada replied derisively.
"Oh boy, don't you two start. And may I make clear that this better be good because I was in the middle of getting changed for bed"
"Oh, if you're tired we can come back later"
"It's okay Harada, I was just kidding. Well, I wasn't kidding about the getting changed part as you can see-Anyway! Don't worry about it, you can stay. I'm not tired anyhow. So, what brings you guys here?"
"Oh, we just thought you could keep us company. There's nobody else to talk to..."
"So is minna suddenly invisible to you or...?"
"Gomen. The truth is, I just want to let off some steam and I can't talk about this with...well, anyone else really. I mean, there aren't many warriors left and the other captains are busy" And by busy you mean one is sick, one is a fury and the other one isn't even here.
"So, I was just a last resort for you guys? Real smooth..."
"Don't think about it like that. We came to you because as a close nakama, we trust ya" Harada stated, paired with a smile.
"You always manage to make a bad situation sound good, don't you?" I questioned to myself quietly, so neither of them could hear me.
"It's not like you're the last person that we could talk to. I mean, Kondou-san and Hijikata-san are probably available, but it's their fault to begin with so we sure can't talk to them..." Nagakura on the other hand, is not so good at making others feel better. I quietly chuckled to myself
"Oh here we go again..." Harada sighed.
"The Fury Corps' a bad idea. A really bad idea. We need to get rid of it before it really screws us over..."
"Getting rid of it would mean also getting rid of Heisuke. I know the furies are bad news, but without them I-I mean, we would have lost Heisuke and I don't think I could bear that"
"I understand that Chiyeko and it's not like I wanted Heisuke to die or anything, but...Can you really even call that being alive?! Just seems cruel to me..."
"You've got a point there..." I mean, Heisuke was SO against the serum and furies that he left the Shinsengumi became of them. No matter what he says about "accepting it", I know-deep down-that he probably hates what he's become...And it's all my fault...I could feel the tears of frustration begin to build up, but I blinked them away. This was my problem, it didn't concern them and I shouldn't drag them into it.
"Every man here knows how it works. Sometimes we kill the other guys, sometimes they kill us. When we go out there we all know we might not come back. But now, they won't even let us die?"
"I know how you feel, but I think you're taking it a little far" Harada spoke up for the first time in a while. "I really doubt Kondou-san and Hijikata-san just leapt into all of this blind. I'm sure they gave it a lot of thought..."
"So what thought is it then? They better not be saying they want to becomes daimyos and have their own castle or whatever"
"Well, come on. You knew Kondou-san's dream was to become a real samurai"
"What the hell Sano! Are you telling me you're actually behind this crap?! So just because you have this just cause, you could mess with the Water of Life?!" It was clear Nagakura was getting angrier and angrier.
"Hey, I'm not saying that, am I?...Look, I'm just saying that I get where they are coming from"
"Well screw you then!" He furiously yelled. "I can't do this sober! I'm going to Shimbara!" Nagakura leapt up and stormed out, roughly sliding my door closed in the process. He left so briskly that the candle in my room blew out. My room fell dark and I heard Harada sigh a little. Damn, I've never seen Nagakura that worked up before...Well, apart from the night of Aburano Koji, but still...It's really surprising when he gets like that...
"So...is it a good idea to let him go to Shimbara in that state?"
"Aw, leave him be. It's not like we could stop him anyway"
"But what about the reason for his anger? If he's drunk he could accidentally start talking about all the Shinsengumi's secrets"
"Don't worry. Drunk or not, even he's not that baka to bring up the Water of Life there" You would hope so, but alcohol can be a very effective lip-loosening tool...Then again, I guess Nagakura would know he'd be in big trouble if he did let something slip, wasted or not.
"I guess you've got a point, but still...I'm kinda worried about him..."
"Well, as you can probably tell, he's a good guy and because of that...he just can't let go of a lot of stuff" He's right, I mean even I feel like the Shinsengumi is slowly changing...It must be hard for Nagakura to accept all this change so quickly...
"Harada, can...Can I ask you a question?"
"Hm? What is it?"
"What do you think about the furies? And please, give me an honest answer"
"Hm..." He sighed before his gaze fell downward, he looked like he was deep in thought. "I can see where Shinpachi's coming from...We're forcing life into people who were supposed to die and turning them into monsters. I think it's wrong" Yeah, you're not the only one who thinks that..."But...without that serum, Heisuke would have definitely died"
"Yeah..."
"And I can sort of see where Kondou-san and Hijikata-san are coming from. If the Shinsengumi goes under...If the shogunate writes us off...Kondou-san and Hijikata-san may no longer be classified as samurai. I'm sure those two have no other way of living besides the Shinsengumi"
Kondou-sama would be devastated if the Shinsengumi were written off. Having his dream ripped away from him like that...And I'm not exactly sure how Hijikata-san would feel if the Shinsengumi were forced to disband, but I'm pretty sure he'd be just as broken up about it as Kondou-sama. They did start the group together after all..."...Shinpachi is from a samurai family, so he may not understand where Kondou-san is coming from"
"What used to keep us together and united as one is beginning to slowly tear us apart...?"
"...It's hard to say for sure" He replied after a pause. "I mean, it could just mean that what we were working for wasn't the same in the first place"
"You really think that...?"
"You told me to be honest Chiyeko and honestly...I think maybe we all just had the misconception that we were after the same thing"
"I see..." I had to admit, it was saddening to see the group I'd admired for so long in a state of turmoil like this.
"I dunno...I know in my head that it can't be helped. But because we had such good times...it's tough"
"Harada..." Harada was always so kind and mature, not to mention dependable. No matter who was speaking with, he always managed to have their best interests in mind. That's what makes him such a good friend, but because he can understand where Kondou-sama and Hijikata-san are coming from, it's got to be much harder for him to stay neutral and trust his superiors...
"Gomenasai...Not only did you have to watch me deal with Shinpachi, but now you gotta hear me vent"
"Don't worry yourself about it. Nakamas should always be there to lend an ear" I smiled to reassure him. "I may not be able to do much, but I can always listen to my nakama's worries"
"Hey Chiyeko?"
"Hai?"
"You gotta get out of the habit of thinking you can't do much for anyone. You're not here because you can't do anything, ya know?"
"You do remember that I'm just a foot soldier of the 8th Division, right? It's not like I have the influence to really do anything important for the Shinsengumi..." Except mess up and cause them trouble...
"That's where you're wrong. You've done various important things for the Shinsengumi. You've gone on undercover missions for us, fought alongside us and put yourself in danger for us...You're more powerful than you think"
"Harada..."
"And if that's not enough then..." He reached his hand tenderly towards my head and patted the top of it, much like an elder brother would do. "...At the very least, I feel a lot better after talking with you. It's like you said, there are times when it's good to cheer a nakama up just by being there for them"
"Do you honestly believe that's true?"
"Come on Chiyeko, you know me. I'm not witty enough to lie without showing it"
"Hehe, I guess you're right...Arigato gozimasu Harada, I think I really needed to hear that right now" I thanked him with a smile, but for some reason I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes again. Why am I upset...? I don't understand...Harada must have noticed because he gently lifted my head up by my chin and spoke with worry laced in his tone;
"I was so caught up in how I was feeling that I forgot to ask how you were doing"
"...I'm fine" I backed away from him and wiped at my eyes. "All this change is just confusing and a bit overwhelming, I think" Yeah, that must be it.
"Are you sure?" I nodded in response. "Well, I'll always be around if you need someone to vent too" He chuckled and I giggled quietly in response.
"Arigato Harada, I really appreciate it"
"Don't sweat it. Anyways, it's not good for me to stay here too long so I'm gonna head out"
"I doubt anyone will think anything of it, but I get what you mean. Oyasumi Harada"
"Oyasumi. Oh and Chiyeko?"
"Yeah?"
"Arigato" He ruffled my hair with a slightly mischievous grin before leaving my room.
"I'm not a child!" I yelled at the closed door. I muttered to myself as I began to fix my hair, but then realised that I was about to go to bed and didn't need to. I finished changing into my sleepwear and crawled under my blanket. My thoughts wandered as I laid there awake. If Harada is ever faced with a situation where he has to decide to drink the serum, what would he do? Would he drink the Water of Life, just like Heisuke did or would he refuse it...? I shook my head and turned onto my side. I hope he never has to face that decision.