(Completed) What happens when New Kids have a bus crash while on tour. Well it happened a year ago and one member isn't coping well with the aftermath of the accident. Jordan has now blocked out any memories of the crash including any memories of th...
Here it is the last chapter of this story 😭😭😭😭😭. Book 2 Never Alone will be up soon.
Well this is it, the moment of truth if all my hard work paid off. I remember everything now without blocking it out especially after the blackout I had last week where I zoned out and remembered the crash and waking up. I still get nightmares about the bus crash now and then. I still feel the effect of my injuries from the crash as I still can be seen limping about now and then especially when its cold or when I am tired mainly cos I have nerve damage plus I have scars to show my other injuries I had. There is a one on the side of my head from my forehead above my left eye around my top of my head back above my ear and down in front of it but you have to be close up to see as I cover to up to make it faint plus my hair slightly longer these days. The one on my stomach is sort of covered by my jeans but can be seen defiantly if clothing is too low. The one I am most nervous about is the one on my left leg below my knee cos on the cruise I will have to wear shorts. It's not a pretty scar as my leg was so messed up. I am just lucky to still to have that leg even though there is some nerve damage. I am still lucky. Donnie and Joe call them my battle scars but I hate them. Its always a reminder of what happened especially the one on my face I see that every day. Donnie does to limp occasionally but you see it more on his TV show when he is running but I limp more than he does. Then there is Jon who sits down for too long or does the wrong type of dance movement his back starts to spasm .
Enough about the past as I am here to enjoy this years cruise as I didn't really enjoy last years through the pain and of course the drinking a lot. I actually don't remember last year's cruise very well. I want to remember and enjoy this years . I have been sober for six months well since the day I got the divorce papers. I drank into a stupor that night. I ended up in hospital again. Everyone except the band thinks it was exhaustion. Really I had OD on alcohol and substance. I only now realize how bad it got. I was in denial and angry, I was in a very dark place. Now I have gotten onto the next stage: acceptance.
Here I am next to four guys who helped turn my life around and through the very hard dark days. I standing on the balcony watching the fans come on board. This cruise is going to be my turning point. To make me happy again. I hope but I am getting anxious that I am going to fuck it up or getting angry in front of the fans. My emotions are still haywire. I want to become Jordan once again. I look over at the guys again, Jon catches my stare. He smiles at me and I smile back. I am single again so maybe I can find that new someone as I turn back to look at fans again.
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Joe and Donnie come over and grab me to dance with them. We start fooling around like teenagers again. This is going to be a great cruise. I am going to enjoy these next four days.
THE END.
There you go the last part of this book. the story continues in book 2 'Never Alone' as I am worried that the book would be too long. Hope you have enjoyed it as much as I have written this.
